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Author Topic: I have an idea  (Read 3895 times)

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Offline dak

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Re: I have an idea
« Reply #15 on: October 03, 2008, 12:05:40 PM »
ok here is the open of first chapter what do you think?
   A cloudy day, look like it going to rain. Everyone go as fast as they to the places they want to reach before it rain. But there are two person still walking slowly. A little girl and a beautiful woman. The little girl is about eight or nine years old and kind of playful, she always run first, look at all the building and people with curious and joyful eyes. After looking at the fastfood stand for a while, she turn back and call the woman: Mother, i'm tired. When will we reach that place?
   Her mother walk to her at her same speed, give her child a small smile and say: We will reach there soon, dear.
   The girl, tired voice: I'm thirsty
   Her mother, calm voice: I told you not to run, didn't i?
   The girl: But you can't expect me to live with just a cup of juice even if i didn't run.
   Her mother, sigh: are you try to persuade me to buy you another juice?
   The girl, smile silly: You got me.
   Her mothe, look at her and give her a small smile: Your smile is just like father's.
   The girl, surprised voice: really? really, mother? my smile is just like father's?
   Her mother look at her with sad eyes and nod. The girl yell cheerfully and started to run again. She look very happy.
   After about half hour, those two now are standing before a big gate. The girl look up and cling to her mother, she said with scared voice: Mother, are you sure father is here? This place look so creepy!
   Rub her child's head lightly, she lead her child in. On the stone board located outside the door written: Tomobiki Center Graveyard.

   They walk slowly, past though some grave stones before stop before one. The woman look at her child and say with sad voice: Mayuka, here is place where your father rested. Come and pray for him, dear.
   Mayuka walk slowly toward the stone and stop before it. On the stone written:
Here lie our true hero, the one who sacrifice his life for everyone's life.
   Born 4/13/1980 Death 9/11/2008
Hope his soul shall rest in peace.

sr for bad writing skill
The only person Lum love is Ataru.
Only thing i can do is watch over her from darkness.


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