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Author Topic: And there was none - Ataru guilt  (Read 2538 times)

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Offline kyo

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And there was none - Ataru guilt
« on: February 18, 2008, 09:26:16 PM »
I loved the ending to this one but how About we make ataru do the unthinkble eh ?


Ataru: here I am inside the hostipal, waiting till they haul me off to jail for nine counts of murder. All my friends are dead, even...lum.
lum is dead, dead because of me. I cant' recall taking her life, neither can I recalled taking the others. Lum if you listening to me, where ever your beautiful oni soul is at the moment. (funny, where do oni go when they died ? ) I'm sorry for whatever pain you suffer doing your death at my hands.  the nurse that is cleaning my room, is turning down the television right now. that give me the time to take out the gun I hidden from every cop and place it to my head. Lum I loved you, Lum I love you, Lum I lo-

Bam !

 two hours later in a small office downtown

Date: june 6

time: 4:pm

investigating officer : kenji yohona

SUBJECT : ATARU MOROBOSHI -male- japanese age 17

FINDING : suicide

DISPOSITION : Deceased

SUMMARY REPORT :

On the afternoon of june 6, Ataru moroboshi was omited to tomoboiki hostipal. there docters said he was very silent. the nurse that was taking care of Moroboshi room did not know he had hidden a gun. At 2:25, Ataru fired a single fatal gunshot wound to the head. A life squad was summoned at 2:27 Ataru was pronounced dead at the scene.

wow... very disturbing 8|

"darling, you give too much thought to what is real and what is not, to what is true and what is false. I realize that is your way, but just this once, accept things as they are. Forego your control, your discipline. and take me with you.

lum plea to kyo final chapter of sins of the family.

Offline DarkDevil

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #1 on: February 18, 2008, 10:21:34 PM »
Meaning that Lum is dead, yes. :'(
If you mean by Ataru, not really. :/
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Offline kyo

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #2 on: February 18, 2008, 10:42:16 PM »
Meaning that Lum is dead, yes. :'(
If you mean by Ataru, not really. :/
I mean that was not how I plan it but no lum is not dead ataru dead not lum
"darling, you give too much thought to what is real and what is not, to what is true and what is false. I realize that is your way, but just this once, accept things as they are. Forego your control, your discipline. and take me with you.

lum plea to kyo final chapter of sins of the family.

Offline Jataru

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #3 on: February 18, 2008, 11:39:44 PM »
But why you think Ataru commit suicide? Because he thaugh that Lum was dead also Shinobu and Sakura. I don�t think he could commit suicide if the others died
« Last Edit: January 25, 2009, 02:34:21 PM by Lum-chan »

Offline Shutaro

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #4 on: February 19, 2008, 01:42:49 AM »
It's a fanfic, it doesn't have to commit to all the restraints of the original media. Let's just find out where Kyo is taking this before we start to judge it  :B

Offline sidzero

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #5 on: February 19, 2008, 02:52:35 AM »
I didn't think Ataru COULD die.
Excuse me, have you seen my mind? I seem to have misplaced it...

Offline Forgotten_Lum

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #6 on: February 19, 2008, 04:40:22 AM »
I didn't think Ataru COULD die.

that's so true, knowing how unlucky he is, the gun probably would have jammed
This is Jenga lol :)

Offline DarkDevil

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #7 on: February 19, 2008, 01:27:26 PM »
Very true, very true.
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Offline GiovaneDinamitardo

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #8 on: February 19, 2008, 07:42:34 PM »
Quote
On the afternoon of june 6, Ataru moroboshi was omited to tomoboiki hostipal. there docters said he was very silent. the nurse that was taking care of Moroboshi room did not know he had hidden a gun. At 2:25, Ataru fired a single fatal gunshot wound to the head. A life squad was summoned at 2:27 Ataru was pronounced dead at the scene.

That's a wonderful introduction for a new ending of this episode !!!

I continue from this point.

******

The same evening Lamù was still on the house of Moroboshi: her heart broken, she wasn't able to stop to cry.

[Mrs Moroboshi, with gentle voice] Dear...... you cannot continue anymore to cry in this way.
[Lamù, even crying] ALL IT...... ALL IT HAPPENED WAS DUE TO MY FAULT !!! I'D NEVER HAVE TO ACCEPT THE INVITE OF MENDO !!! I'D NEVER ACCEPT TO HAVE A PART IN THEIR DIRTY GAME !!! I.....I WANNA DIE !!!
[Mrs Moroboshi, same voice] NO !!! NOT YOU TOO !!! I've already lost my son, I don't wanna lose also you !!!
[Lamù, now sighing I....I will leave the Earth.
[Mrs Moroboshi] WHY ?!?
[Lamù, same voice]....n....nothing link me now to this planet !!!
[Mrs Moroboshi, crying] PLEASE !!!! PLEASE !!! STAY WITH ME !!! JUST FOR SOMETIMES !!! NOW I FEEL  OUR HOUSE TOTALLY EMPTY WITHOUT ATARU !! PLEASE !!! JUST FOR SOMETIMES !!!
[Lamù, with a large breath] All right, Mrs Moroboshi. And thank you. Maybe togheter we could heal each other.....even if.........even if.........he will never come back to us.

But just the day after.......

Lamù was flying slowly in the sky, trying to avoid to think once again to Ataru when she heared a notorious way to say.

[voice] LAAAAAAAADIEEEEEEEEEES !!!! COME ON !!!! LET'S GO OUT FOR A DATE !!!! LET'S GO OUT FOR A DATE !!!!

Lamù was shocked !!! That voice was so familiar for her !!!
So she landed slowly, trying to hide herself, to the place where the voice came from....
.... and saw another notorious scene.

[Ataru, excited] Hello dolly, always on the run, stop right now: I wanna thank you very much !
[Girl, wondering] Why? And who are you ?!?
[Ataru, with fake serious voice, so close to her] Because I know that you're a solitary baby that need some fun. I'm not perfect but I'm perfect for you !!!
[Girl, laughting] You're very crazy and so cool ??
[Atar, same voice] Just "so cool" ?!? I'm Ataru, the biggest lover of the whole universe: the biggest one that you've never seen !!! So, when we could have a date ?!?
[Girl, even laughting] Well.......on my onw........I would have any problem........but I think that that girl behind you won't agree so much !!
[Ataru, wondering]....eh ?!? "That girl who's behind me ?!?

He turned slowly and..........

[Ataru, scared] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEK !!! LAMU' !!!! WHY YOU ARE HERE ?!?
[Lamù, rather crying] You.............you..... ...........YOU'RE ALIVE !!!!!! DAAAAAAAAAARLING [and jumped on his arms and huged so much] YOU'RE ALIVE !!!!
[Ataru, rather bored] SURE THAT I'M STILL ALIVE !!!
[Lamù, now wondering] But.........but.......at the hospital the nursers have sayed to me that.......that.....
[Ataru, now with a sad laught] WAHAHAHAHAH !!! DID YOU LIKE THE SCENE ?!? I DESERVE THE OSCAR !!! WHEN I REALIZED THAT YOU'VE CRAPPED ME I DECIDED TO GIVE BACK YOUR PAY WITH YOUR SAME MONEY !!!
[Lamù, even huged to him, even crying] I'm so happy................... ......BUT.........[now with angry voice]..............I'M ALSO TOO ANGRY WITH YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU !!!! [and gave him a terrible zap]

Now Ataru was running away, trying to escape the zaps of Lamù.

[Ataru, running and screaming at the same time] STOOOOOP !!! STOOOOOP !!! I CAN EXPLAIN EVERYTHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIING !!!
[Lamù, flying, charging up others zaps] DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARLING, THIS TIME I WON'T FORGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE YOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD !! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD !! YOU'LL PAY !!!

But, at the same time, she was thinking: "Oh, well, it's better this way: finally everything came back to normal".

[Lamù, flying, charging others zaps but with a large smile] DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARLING !!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD !!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD !!! I WANT TO GIVE TO YOU MY WORST ZAP AND THEN I WANT TO HAVE A DATE WITH YOU !!!!
[Ataru, running but with a large smile] I'M SORRY, I HAVE A RESPONSABILITY IN FRONT OF MY HAREM !!! YOU'LL HAVE TO WAIT FOR SOMETIMEEEEEEEEEES !!!!!!!!

.... and disappeared behind the horizon.........
[
« Last Edit: January 16, 2011, 10:59:37 PM by Lum-chan »

Offline kyo

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #9 on: February 19, 2008, 08:57:03 PM »
ha-ha not bad amazing but i was gonna bring ataru back another way.... time travel
"darling, you give too much thought to what is real and what is not, to what is true and what is false. I realize that is your way, but just this once, accept things as they are. Forego your control, your discipline. and take me with you.

lum plea to kyo final chapter of sins of the family.

Offline cata

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #10 on: February 21, 2008, 11:19:07 AM »
If I had seen this in TV... I would be crying and after watching the ending I would be relieved just like when I watched "And There Was None" episode.

Offline dak

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Re: And there was none - Ataru guilt
« Reply #11 on: October 02, 2008, 05:59:56 AM »
interesting, don't mind if i use your idea in my story, uncle GiovaneDinamitardo
The only person Lum love is Ataru.
Only thing i can do is watch over her from darkness.

 

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