The World of Urusei Yatsura's Lum
Urusei Yatsura - RPG, Movies, Episodes & Stories => RPG Storylines & FanFiction => Topic started by: kyo on February 11, 2008, 01:46:18 AM
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first story ever.
Posted on: February 11, 2008, 01:35:57 AM
I don t� own urusei yatsura )
� I REALLY DO MEAN IT�
BY KYO MOROBOSHI/ Kevin (my real name)
�This is it� said ataru looking at a single box. For two years he was brother by a young girl � named lum . for two years she zapped him and sometimes beat him because
she think she is his wife. As far as ataru know he want to be her husband. More
then once he wanted to say � to hell with it� and wanted to go to lum planet
and lived there with her. But he don�t� know how to say I love you. so what do he do ?
he put up a front , to everyone else he was skirt chasing ataru. a Mega-hentai freak.
No. he was practicing so when that day arrives when he was alone with her. he could pop The question so they can leave without any crap from his parents ,shinobu, Or lum stormtroopers . so he spend six months to learn oni so he can speak to lum in her native tongue . he also brought wedding rings that he kept in a tiny black box . but today he gonna use them . he ask his mother and father for a dinner bash saying � they wont� regret it �. he invited everyone in his school to come. Everyone was shock to see ataru Less girl-loving . only one he paid attention to was lum, talking to her, joking with her, he even tried to kiss her . to lum bodyguards that was one big NO-NO and began they attack on ataru who pointed a finger to them saying they could leave so they all sat down.
After the failed attack mendo than ask: moroboshi ! why did you invite us here ?And why didn�t� you tried to get a feel for any of the girls ? said the rest .
Because:
1) it about lum
2) because I didn�t� feel like it
3) It time to make our lives Right.
Lum, he said do you known what I am about to ask you ? said ataru she shook her head no . will you marry me ?( In oni) Yes darling ! she scream.WHAT ? scream ten. what did he said to lum ten ? said mendo he said would you marry me ? Mendo almost had a heart attack
(that the end of the first chapter sorry it was short ,so how do you like ? )
That how I began The story straight to the point. really when I think back To it... It was not good I should have Tease the reader Or I could Have them go To a Park or something. I had To work on mendo and shinobu expressions next chapter is gonna be better... for my sake
from kevin with love. :/
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I think you don't have much expertations for this.
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Thank you... I'll do my best... :@
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Well Kyo... I can only give you this advice... here goes... My advice is... Just ignore DarkDevil we all do... mostly when he's in a bad mood... (that I think its everyday)
As for your fanfic... Its good... a bit hard to understand... but I guess you aren't used to write in english...
For the continuation of the story you could go back in time... like 1 month or something... and show us how he got to that point of asking the "Big Question"... to Lum... Or just continue with your script... LoL
Anyway I'll be waiting for next chapter...
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Who the hell is changing my posts!?
I've said:
I think you don't have much expertations for this.
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Good start for yer brand new fanfic,kyo,cant wait for the coming episodes
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Well Kyo... I can only give you this advice... here goes... My advice is... Just ignore DarkDevil we all do... mostly when he's in a bad mood... (that I think its everyday)
As for your fanfic... Its good... a bit hard to understand... but I guess you aren't used to write in english...
For the continuation of the story you could go back in time... like 1 month or something... and show us how he got to that point of asking the "Big Question"... to Lum... Or just continue with your script... LoL
Anyway I'll be waiting for next chapter...
THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME ON THAT. and truth be told I am american and not used to writing but I'm trying.
Posted on: February 11, 2008, 09:20:06 PM
Who the hell is changing my posts!?
I've said:
I think you don't have much expertations for this.
yeah I just cuss out darkdevil and gotten some steam out of my eyes ! oh well on to the show.
Posted on: February 11, 2008, 09:21:33 PM
To all the folks who read the first chapter this is for you. I� am sorry that there was no humor� I� will tried my best this time I will also change the oni way of speaking to backwards
Like this: lliw uoy yrram em ? : will you marry me? And now on
To the � wait a second wrong fan fiction sorry� let begin! and ps I really don�t� own urusei yatsura)
�ATARU REALLY DO MEAN IT�
chapter two : love and crossbows
BY kyoto/kevin
everyone in the house that belongs to ataru was silent. It seem like a ghost has sucked the souls out of everyone W-what did you just say ataru? Said the young man mother as she tried hard not to faint. I think ten made it clear to everyone I want to marry my� dear. What? Everyone scream. Lum always call me darling so I am going call her dear it makes sense. You are lying ataru ! shouted shinobu no I am� not If you want proof � he lean next to lum and kiss her- for nine minutes and said �just wait till I get the futon out� now lum really wanted to go to bed. Ataru smile� �Now have patience my beautiful wife we have time for that later.� we still have to tie up some use ends. Ataru than excuse himself and ran upstairs
Lum have a really dreamy look in her eye �shinobu and ataru mother was on the verge of crying while ataru father was reading the newspaper. After several minutes ataru came down with a very large box. Everyone today is the most happiest day of my life ataru said for two years you all well tried to take lum away from me� well it did not work ha! But I stilled have gifts for you. Ataru open the box mother, father this is for everything . he handed a very large letter. Inside was a lot of cash. How did you get this !? well I stole it � from mendo�
WHAT ! scream the enrage prince of cash as he withdraw his sword. Now hold on a second mendo I have a gift for you too�. He toss mendo a box mendo ,When he open it he saw a little robin dead with a arrow in it heart ,mendo was almost scared But what ataru had next REALLY scared him. Who killed cock-mendo ? I said the ataru with my DOUBLE EDGE CROSSBOW I killed him� mendo was about to scream when ataru pulled the trigger . NOOOOOOOOOO! Scream mendo. And nothing not a sound mendo saw the arrow and it little note : GOTCHA ! ataru didn�t� �laugh he toss the toy away and said that how I felt when lu- I mean dear feign death� I really thought she died.
God I love you as he kiss lum again he toss everyone else gifts ranging from books to art then he pick lum up and excuse himself by saying �if you hear any moaning tonight that will be us �. He kiss lum and rushed upstairs.
to me best chapter yet. to tell you the truth it only took me a hour to write it. if you a big urusei yatsura fan you caught the cock-robin joke if you not yet me explain.
in the uy ep : than there was none. the uy gang travel to a island because they was summon. than one by one they are killed off. when it was lum turn to die, Ataru was messed up and he could not control himself. when he found the killer it look just like him. fast forward some time later and ataru is in a hosptial. while the uy cast is in a office by police looking guilty. they set ataru up to be shock into stop girl chasing only one not involed in the plan was lum. so she fake her death with a pill. when they went to visit Ataru they heard a gunshot rang out. thinking Ataru killed himself to be with a Persumed dead lum but ataru was watching a cowboy tv show and trying to get the number of a nurse.
the whole "murders" was based off of the mother goose song about cock-robin. (look it up) another thing is... lum and ataru didnt do it... yet >:) plus if I spelled futon wrong tell me. now the next chapter I had Ataru and Ten converstaion.
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Who the hell is changing my posts!?
I've said:
I think you don't have much expertations for this.
It's not the first time this has happened.
Edit: Don't tell me my owner has been here?! :o :N ;( :-X
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Who the hell is changing my posts!?
I've said:
I think you don't have much expertations for this.
It's not the first time this has happened.
Edit: Don't tel me my owner has been here?! :o :N ;( :-X
yeah he was.
Posted on: February 12, 2008, 09:01:35 PM
2 more chapters what a shame†not really yeah I do had two chapters but those are stories chapter. When I write a fan fiction I always put a trivia section. You know where I get the idea of getting the lines for the story and such or give background information on the characters. At the last chapter I mess up a little “it kiss not kisse “I was nervous okay? Now for the disclaimer I do not own urusei yatsura. Now on to…
BABY OUR BA- no wait wrong one.†SORRY FOLKS !)
ATARU REALLY DO MEAN IT. by kyo/kevin
It has been three days since ataru propose to her. Three days since he told his parents, friends and rival. Three days since he repay his parents. Three days since he made mendo crap his pants with a rubber robin and a toy crossbow (his pants will never be clean again) three days since …well you know. And what is the famous couple doing right now? They are taken their friends to planet uru. And guess who driving? (If you said ataru you getting a free car after the story) darling this is wonderful! Tomorrow we shall be husband and wife said lum. Yeah thought ataru but it will be a little more romantic if we didn’t’ have to bring them here. I mean yeah a space taxi would be nice but they on strike. Get off of my beef bowl! Scream megane to cherry. This beef bowl is cursed said the mad monk allow me to cure the evil from it. By eating it ? Said megane “yes†nodded the mad monk you are not going anywhere near this. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON BACK THERE!? Ataru yell. It cherry he keeps pestering me for my lunch! Megane you ate: 26 six bowls of beef ramen-and that was just an hour ago! I was hun- GOOD GOD MAN! Twenty six! ataru shouted again.
So? Why should I give this beef bowl to cherry? Because as god as my witness I will turn this spaceship around and y’all can get the hell out! Megane gave his lunch to cherry who pray over it and well- devour it.
When they made planetfall lum flew to the waiting arms of her mother and this very um... unique conversation pop up: ho mul woh saw eht pirt! Enif rehtom mul nac I ksa uoy a noitseuq? yhw did uoy dah ot yrram sith toidi ! I heard that! said ataru and before you go on about why I must marry her the answer is simple : I love her and I came this close to losing her ALOT ,I not just a fool who want to have a harem. That dream is dead. And the girl chasing is very boring I mean how many times are you going get punch/smack/burn/zap/hit with a non-living object/ a living object and not get annoy? But all I want to do is… oh sh*t ! Coming with a speed like no other is rei. In his oni bull/tiger form ready to killed ataru and steal lum. Ataru reach from behind his back and gave rei a manju. Rei snatch the manju from ataru and devour it. Ten seconds later he was asleep. What did you put in that manju darling? Said a confused lum. Sleeping traq my beautiful wife... enough to bring down an elephant. Than ataru grab rei horns and pull them off. (Okay for folks new to urusei yatsura when an oni lose his/her horn(s) they are powerless. And a manju is a cake filled with sweet paste made out of beans) ataru whip out a pair of handcuffs and cuff rei hands together and carry him fireman style to the guest room there he found ten. Hello ten! He said with a smirk on his face. What do you want baka ? ( baka = idiot) is that how you treat your cousin in law ? Ataru got down on one knee and ask : what eating you ? “nothing†really? It don’t sound like nothing . ten bit his lip and said okay it you for two years you made lum cried and mad and now all of a sudden you want to marry her ? I mean where you get off on the fact that you show lum a wedding ring and tell her empty words? Ataru was silent for a moment than said: true how do you know I am telling the truth? I could be lying to you and everyone else. But no that not the point I am not lying I WANT HER TEN. I want her real bad. How do you think I felt for two years? Always seeing her but not ever having she? And than when she and you left I felt like tearing my heart out. Remember the time when I went missing? She looked for three days and she made that news report about “keeping my body warm†I swear I was going to do the exact same thing to her. But everything going be okay. Nothing going stop me from marrying lum. How about her father mendo and lum stormtroopers? Said ten. Huh? Standing behind him was mendo Mr. Invader and lum stormtroopers
AT...AR..U! All they could say. Aw sh*T was all ataru could say.
(Okay I am getting good at this and I know I use said a lot by the way remember when I said oni was now backwards? so to understand lum and what her mother said is pretty easy just write down what I wrote and read it forwards so please review.
so... tired cant' type anymore post next chapter when I get a chance
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It is getting worst each post.
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It is getting worst each post.
Is it so bad that it's contagious? I believe the word is "worse", not "worst". ;)
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It is getting worst each post.
Is it so bad that it's contagious? I believe the word is "worse", not "worst". ;)
what do that mean sir sidzero ? :(
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Than ataru grab rei horns and pull them off. (Okay for folks new to urusei yatsura when an oni lose his/her horn(s) they are powerless. And a manju is a cake filled with sweet paste made out of beans) ataru whip out a pair of handcuffs and cuff rei hands together and carry him fireman style to the guest room there he found ten. Hello ten! He said with a smirk on his face.
Sorry, I some times get confused with all the 0s and 1s.
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I mean if someone's going to complain about something, in this case I'm referring to his previous complaints of your writing because the horrible grammar, spelling, and what not, why's he going and making a simple grammar mistake like that? Him and I both complained about it, as I recall. Despite the fact that I may make an ass of myself, I'm assuming that's what he's talking about (I don't have the patience to read your story, frankly, when you can't even get basic grammar correct in the title, no offense), saying it's getting worse every post. Though I could be wrong and he could be talking about your stories getting worse, I don't know.
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I mean if someone's going to complain about something, in this case I'm referring to his previous complaints of your writing because the horrible grammar, spelling, and what not, why's he going and making a simple grammar mistake like that? Him and I both complained about it, as I recall. Despite the fact that I may make an ass of myself, I'm assuming that's what he's talking about (I don't have the patience to read your story, frankly, when you can't even get basic grammar correct in the title, no offense), saying it's getting worse every post. Though I could be wrong and he could be talking about your stories getting worse, I don't know.
look, I kind had to do this everyday because frankly my life sucks... when I'm kevin I cant' show emotion at my school work hard get good grades be nice to the baka teachers all that bullcrap. but here Kevin is kyo : the half oni
yeah I know my grammer bad but hey I dont' see dark devil coming up with anything :(
and the stories dont' make sense do they ?
I'm already rebooting the kyo forlorn fanfic.
ataru and kyo had to wait.
and this story was gonna end the urusei yatsura story line with mayuka.
yeah it a origin for the g.a.m character no, didnt stole it from chette or GiovaneDinamitardo.
It just how i was gonna begin urusei yatsura X. and the reason I make grammer mistakes because I lived with my mom and sister so when the family away, kyo will play moments they come home I had to rush and type this up. IT REALLY ANNOYING AND WHEN IT DONT' MAKE SENSE to anyone it become painful.
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Um, no offense or anything, but is does anyone have a kyo-to-english dictionary handy? Trying to read that last post is making my brain hurt. Something about having a crappy life in the real world because of some self-imposed restriction on showing emotion? So you live in this fantasy world based on UY to deal with it? Escapism isn't the way to cope with reality. Denying yourself isn't the way to deal with it either. You're still in school. You know what school is for, right? It's a place for you to learn. The biggest mistake (in my opinion) that teenagers make when it comes to school is not realizing it for what it is, and not taking advantage of it. Consider this: Do you really think that the ONLY thing you learn in school is what they teach (or try to teach) in class? Or have you considered the possibility that by forcing you to be around all those people that you may or may not like is teaching you another lesson? Teaching you how to cope with people in a stressful situation, so that when you get out into the real world, you're armed with that knowledge. You're ALWAYS going to have people you don't like, no matter who you are, or what you do in life. Those people can be above you, below you, or equal to you. If you can't deal with them, you're just going to find yourself in situations that become worse and worse the further into things you get.
The reason they don't make sense to me is because I can't understand what the hell you're talking about more often than not when you post. Maybe you're not very good with the english language for some reason, I don't know. But please don't get all pissed off when someone like me comes along and tells you that they can't understand your stories because of it. Even if I could read what you were writing, who's to say I would enjoy your stories anyway? Being creative can be a double-edged sword (and a pretty sharp one) when you share that creativity with others. By sharing it, you have to be willing to accept the fact that you WILL be criticized. Trust me on this, I've been an artist and writer for about 20 years now... ever since I was early in grade school. And think of it this way, if you don't have criticism, how would you get any better? Without outside views on what you're doing wrong, how would you know what you focus on improving? If you want advice, I could easily give it to you. I know I need it sometimes. But just because one person doesn't like what you have to offer doesn't mean you have to take it personally, or get upset about it. Think of it as "just one person" and brush it off. When they don't like what you have to say, ask them why. If they can't tell you why, then what does their opinion matter? If they can tell you why, and it's something you don't agree with, again, write it off as "just one person" and go with what you feel is right. It's your work after all, and it's not like you're doing it to get paid. You're doing it for your own enjoyment, really. Now, if someone doesn't like it, and they give you a good reason why... then why get defensive about it? Think along the lines of "Hey, you're right! I really do need to work on that! Let me fix it and try again!" Otherwise you'll just keep making the same mistakes.
And like I said, the biggest criticism I have of your work is that I can't understand what you're saying. My suggestion is that you self-edit. Go over what you write before you post it, and make sure it makes sense.
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wow sidzero, you truly are blunt, you must be th life of the party, but hey, your just one person, it's true that your fic has bad grammar, kyo, but it's also an interesting fic. sidzero may not be able to understand your fic because he is conditioned to proper english and can't read and interpret what someone is trying to say. I do alot of rereading on many fanfics just so i get very bit of info i can out of it to understand the story, sometimes i even fill in missing words, but who cares, i enjoy reading other peoples works because i know i could never be that creative as the author.
If need be so we dont run into a conversation again, and certainly I hope we dont because this ruins the forum, you can send me the next chapter and i'll format it so that others can understand it better
P.S. a daughter of lum fic, careful kyo, that's dangerous ground, be prepared for a decent amount of critisism, especially on plot holes, some fans still have a hard time with wedding fics
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I'm with you, sidzero, but may I informe you that is there a topic for rages, such as that.
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wow sidzero, you truly are blunt, you must be th life of the party, but hey, your just one person, it's true that your fic has bad grammar, kyo, but it's also an interesting fic. sidzero may not be able to understand your fic because he is conditioned to proper english and can't read and interpret what someone is trying to say. I do alot of rereading on many fanfics just so i get very bit of info i can out of it to understand the story, sometimes i even fill in missing words, but who cares, i enjoy reading other peoples works because i know i could never be that creative as the author.
Yes, I am blunt. I see no need to sugar coat things to protect people's feelings. I prefer to take a more honest approach, something a real artist should appreciate. I never much cared to be the "life of the party." I never much cared for anyone else's opinions unless they were beneficial to me.
And it's not so much that I don't understand it, I just don't have the patience to have to read a sentence 3, 4, even 5 times just to figure out what he's saying so I can move on to the next one and do it all over again. A little grammatical error or a few spelling errors here or there... yeah, ok, I could deal with that. But when it gets to the point where my brain starts telling me that the only way I'm going to figure out what's going on with a story is if I edit it myself and THEN read it... it takes all the enjoyment out of reading something, and I'd rather not do that. It's not like I have to read anything. I don't read things like this because I see it there and the brain just clicks on and tells me "oh look, something to read... must read it." I read things because they interest me and I enjoy reading things that interest me. If I can't enjoy reading it... then what the hell exactly is the point in reading it. It's not like it's useful information that I absolutely must read or I'll somehow forget how to breathe.
Also, I wouldn't call that a rage. I call that me trying to explain myself so the kid doesn't take my criticism personally. He's got a desire to write. I understand it. Those that have a desire to create must fulfill that desire or they won't be satisfied. He will continue to have that desire until it burns out. If he doesn't fulfill that desire, he will never be satisfied. I know, I'm the same way. When someone creates, they want to share, hence him posting it. Those who share, want to know what other people think of what they're sharing, regardless of whether or not they care what the people they're sharing with think. Criticism is an important part of that feedback. It helps us know that this thing that we expend so much of our energy on is thought of by others. It also lets us know where our skills (or talents) can be improved. It's the same regardless of whatever it is that's being created. I started to detect the signs that the kid doesn't take criticism to well (looks to me like he takes it too personally), so to try and help him understand that the criticism (at least from me) isn't directed at HIM but at the work, I feel I have to go into these lengthy rants. Trust me, in the end, it's much more helpful this way. I've been doing this comments and criticism thing online for a very, VERY long time. I like to think in that time I've learned a little about helping people push their creativity, and all the things that come with it, to higher levels. :)
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calm down sidzero, I said this was my first fanfic. I would not have made stories like these if I did not want criticism in fact I welcome it. you a pro on this, I'm just trying to get the demons out of my head. the hardest part of being a writer is when your idea shift back and forth you want to move on a bigger project but you still working on the current one. ( I prayed that came out clear.) :@
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Hmmm, I wasn't aware I wasn't calm. Funny how places like these, people like to see meanings beyond that which is there. It's like looking at a toaster and saying "wow, that is one pissed off toaster" when we all know... toasters don't get pissed off. Well, mine doesn't at least.
Anyway, I wouldn't say I was a pro. Pro's make money at it. I just know a lot, and enjoy the things I do. Yes, that did come out clear, I congratulate you. :)
And I agree 100%. That's my biggest problem, as well. I can't keep up with all the ideas I have. You wouldn't believe how many... unfinished productions I have here or there. Not to mention the many ideas that, while great ideas, never got much further than just that. Fortunately I have a fantastic memory, and can manage to keep a hold on most of them somewhere inside my brain.
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ATARU REALLY DO MEAN IT
By Kyo
It seem like ataru badluck is true to form. Mr.invader mendo/lum stormtroopers was all ready to ambush. �Hey uh� ten can you go get lum for me?� Because it about to get dangerous in here� Ten didn�t� have to look hard for lum, she was flying to her room already to see what was all the commotion. Inside she found everybody injured and that ataru was trying to stand up but collapse.
�Dadd- daddy what happen here�? Lum question. �Lum as your father I cant� Let you marry this boy�. �He using you for your body, he don�t� really to marry you� . Lum have a look of rage in her eyes and grab ataru by the collar. I knew it was too good to be true!
Ataru cant� help but look surprise at lum. The engagement is off ataru. Ataru could not believe his ears he tried to offer a word in his defense but could not say anything. �Ten! You know what we was talking about please tell lum�! Ten turn his back on ataru. �Ten please�� begged ataru the little boy sat next to his uncle. �Okay ataru said so that how you choose your allies? Fine I leave, this belongs to you. He gave lum a letter and waved his farewells to everyone. Then he only took cherry back to earth. (Yes, he left his parents and Lum stormtroopers on planet uru.)
Two days later�
Ataru was finish un-packing in his new house. He owned it to mendo who �funded� his new living quarters. He brought the house two months ago so �she� and ataru could live there, but that dream went to hell, now it was just him he had to check on his parent�s house everyday. It was 10:47 pm if he did not go to bed now he was going be late for school.
That night Ataru could hardly sleep, he was worried about lum, would she still loves him if he say I love you? �Funny if you think about it I never got the chance to Say how much I love her� Ataru said. That night all ataru could do was think about lum. Finally he went in a deep sleep.
At 6:16 he got up and got ready for school. An hour later he sat in his seat and examined the classroom none of the stormtroopers was there or mendo and lum was nowhere to be seen. �Good� he thought �they still gone�. Onsen mark started class and could not keep his eyes off ataru hand. Nether could the girls who were surprised to see ataru back so early. He even stops class for a moment just to see what wrong with ataru.
T After that the day went by normal until shinobu asks to see ataru at the tea house. When he got there she was sitting at a table on the second floor. �Hello ataru� she said. �Hey� he answers. �Can I ask you a question about lum�? Her name hit him like a brick. �Why is she not at school and where are mendo and the others�? Ataru told her everything that happened and when he was finish shinobu sat quiet.
�Now I know what you thinking why did I let her go�? �Simple to tell you the truth I don�t� trust myself either�. �I was so happy when I propose I didn�t even think about the future�, hell I didn�t even get to say I love you lum.� Her father just looking out for his only daughter. So here I am in a tea shop with you pouring my heart out and the ironic part is she wanted to get married. And I agreed with her, now she don�t� want me, sad isn�t� it? But hey it is fate. (He mimic cherry hand signs) shinobu could not help to laugh. But she saw that he eyes was red. Are you going to be okay?
�No I�m not going be okay, I was getting used to us being a family, I even have names For when we Have a child.� Ataru said lost in thought. �So How about the others?� shinobu ask with uncertainty. �They still on planet uru, I had to call the salt mines and tell them my father is �injured�.
�Look shinobu as much as I enjoy talking to you I have to Go home.� On that note ataru pay the tab and left the teashop. for shinobu this is got to be the first time ataru Never grab her or ask her for her number and address (even though he has it already). Maybe ataru losing lum can be the best thing that happens to females since they invented sliced bread.
(Okay I went back and fix the errors� the god forsaken errors. }:| This is from my computer the original rough draft of chapter four)
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Ok "Lum-aholics", if you want to get rid of your frustrations, do it in NB or so. Now, back to the topic: Kyo, I like your story and I think you have great creativity and imagination. If you want, you can ask any Moderator to correct your fanfics without changing the story.
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Way to go Kyo! Revised version looks awesome. Do you plan making the next chapter?
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Way to go Kyo! Revised version looks awesome. Do you plan making the next chapter?
half way done urusei neo
Posted on: March 20, 2008, 09:26:04 PM
URUSEI YATSURA ' ATARU REALLY DO MEAN IT- chapter five- LOVE LOST AND REGAIN.
(What happen to lum after ataru left?)
Lum look at the spaceship carrying away her Ex. Fiance, how can he do that to her? He never really loves her in the first place, but still it was so right.
She look at the letter ataru have given her, it was mark with a seal that look like a teardrop. She opens the letter and began to read what it said:
“If you reading this letter lum, its means we're not together anymore.
I can't believe that it didn't work out! I was getting use to the idea That we would always be one but it was never meant to be. I guess its my Fault, I'm so shy and insecure that I ruined my chance at happiness But it was fun while it Lasted. So Just so you know (you never know)
That I will always love you lum.
P.S have a wonderful and Romantic life !!!'
Lum eyes begin to filled with tears as she re-read the letter over and over again.
Finally Lum scream 'DARLING!' she rushed To her window To see The ship leave.
“I won't be able to see Ataru for two whole weeks, By than he already have someone new !!!
sorry, have Trouble on that last one hope you understood it. only two Chapters left anyway...
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Everyone! We must go to Planet Uru and bring Lum back to Earth!
Actually I have a question. What is the planet's official name? Is it Uru? I've heard Oniboshi before too.
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I think both names refer to the Lum's planet and both names are correct. I'm not sure, though.
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Everyone! We must go to Planet Uru and bring Lum back to Earth!
Actually I have a question. What is the planet's official name? Is it Uru? I've heard Oniboshi before too.
I heard its was oni star
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Oniboshi IS "Oni Star" (you know, the same way Moroboshi is "Falling Star"). I've heard both names given, though Oniboshi only in the Anime. It would make sense to me if the planet was Uru, and the star was Oniboshi, much like in our star system, our planet is Earth, and our star is Sol.
Kyo, you're getting a little better, though I still think you could use an editor.
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Sidzero: I think when you said "Sol" you wanted to say "Sun".
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Unless "Sol" is the name of our sun... I don't know, it's the first time I've heard of the name.
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In my country (Portugal) the Sun is called "Sol" but as we speak English in here (most threads, posts, topics, replies, etc.), it makes sence to say "Sun" and not "Sol".
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No, I mean "Sol". The sun is just a common name, but the scientific (at least as far as Astronomy is concerned) name for it is the original Latin term, "Sol". Like you can point out just about any star in the sky, and it'll have a name, so too does the star of our own system, the Solar System.
And I know, Sol is what the sun is called in many Latin-derived languages (and surprisingly many Nordic Languages too).
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Solar System... SOLar system
Sol comes from Solar ^_^
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Sol comes from Solar ^_^
Actually, it's' the other way around. ;)
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Well at least I got that the were connected...
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I believe the official name of Lum's planet is Uru, simply because of the 3 letter-name like in everything else Oni -related in the anime (I've said this before in another topic, just forgot where...).
Lum,Ten,Rei,Ran,Oni,Uru... get it?
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I was gonna say what about 'datcha'
but... is datcha japanese or oni?
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It's Japanese. It's kinda like saying "eh?" at the end of your sentences, like our northern neighbors in Canada do.
As far as the 3 letter names... I've got one name for you: "Invader"
Throws the WHOLE theory off.
Also, Ran isn't Oni. She's about as much Oni as Benten is. I forgot what it's called that she was patterned after, but it was some kind of energy vampire like creature from Japanese folklore.
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nice one with the invader thing
also I don't use "eh" as much as you think. TV shows really exaggerate with that and make us sound dumb.
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Then it must just be people from Minnesota, Wisconsin, and almost every Canadian I'VE ever met.
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I said AS MUCH as you think.
Now... let's wait for a new chapter, kinda crowding his topic
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nice to know that there's a fellow canadian that disagrees with the americans stereotyping canadians, i almost never say "eh", only time i do say it is when i want to act like the total canadian stereotype
anyway, datcha is used at the end to sound cute, usually used by children a generation or two ago, not too common now a days
anyway back on topic, i hope you hurry with the next chapter, it is a interesting story and when i first read it on fanfiction i thought it was dead so please hurry
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Forgotten_Lum I never ever killls my fanfics, (the fornlon one has to die it was getting insane but I fix that...sorta) and I do have one problem with the fanfic. I dont' know how to finished it ??? that why I said two weeks.
but a lighter note I do have (and I kid you not) 56 ways to end the story.
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You know, there's an easy way to decide which ending you could use...
Write a list of all these ideas for endings you have.
Make sure you number each and every one of these ideas (trust me, it's easier to keep track of that way).
Now, set them up in a tournament bracket type of thing.
Next, acquire yourself a coin of some sort (I prefer silver dollars, but even a penny would do).
Finally, start flipping said coin for every matchup in the tournament, and let the winner be your choice.
Or you can go with the power of democracy. If you can sum up your endings in extremely short descriptions (like a sentence or two), then just form up a poll here and let the people decide. Actually, that just gave me a really awesome idea that I'm going to have to try someday if I'm ever a famous writer of some sort. Come up with the basic idea of the story, and at certain points in the story, just stop, and let fans decide what should happen next. I'll probably never do it cause I'm a control freak, but it could be cool. Reminds me of when I was a kid, and DC comics let fans vote whether or not to kill off Robin. It worked out pretty well.
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You know, there's an easy way to decide which ending you could use...
Write a list of all these ideas for endings you have.
Make sure you number each and every one of these ideas (trust me, it's easier to keep track of that way).
Now, set them up in a tournament bracket type of thing.
Next, acquire yourself a coin of some sort (I prefer silver dollars, but even a penny would do).
Finally, start flipping said coin for every matchup in the tournament, and let the winner be your choice.
Or you can go with the power of democracy. If you can sum up your endings in extremely short descriptions (like a sentence or two), then just form up a poll here and let the people decide. Actually, that just gave me a really awesome idea that I'm going to have to try someday if I'm ever a famous writer of some sort. Come up with the basic idea of the story, and at certain points in the story, just stop, and let fans decide what should happen next. I'll probably never do it cause I'm a control freak, but it could be cool. Reminds me of when I was a kid, and DC comics let fans vote whether or not to kill off Robin. It worked out pretty well.
it not that easy they all hard thought ending for-
wait a second... okay this ending is great and very urusei yatsura
thanks sidzero :)
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Glad to help.
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One story, Three Endings
You Choose The ending, I will do It :
Ending one: Lum and ataru married in Their 20's
Ending Two : Ataru Fight Every freaking male in the universe and wins
Ending three : Lum tries to "convince" Ataru to return to her with the Promise of being in his Harem.
Personally I want to end this silly story for Good... and I need your help.
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You ask me, ending two isn't even a possibility. Ending three isn't likely (I don't care WHAT you think of Lum, she would NEVER agree to that). Leaving ending one, which if you ask me, is what would happen between them anyway.
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hmm.... you are correct but it how I'm going tell the story sidzero, that will matter (I really want to do of combo of two and three, That will be sweet)