The World of Urusei Yatsura's Lum

Urusei Yatsura - RPG, Movies, Episodes & Stories => RPG Storylines & FanFiction => Topic started by: GiovaneDinamitardo on June 24, 2011, 11:58:21 PM

Title: BRIGAND GHOST
Post by: GiovaneDinamitardo on June 24, 2011, 11:58:21 PM
URUSEI YATSURA, THE UNOFFICIAL 10TH SEASON (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=993.0)[/b][/color] (click on this link to read the whole plot of this saga).

"BRIGAND GHOST"

CHAPTER ONE: CURSED !! [/size]


Tomobiki, early May.


A bells scratched away the strange atmosphere that had fallen over Tomobiki that morning: it was getting dark everywhere but, still low on the horizon, a stubborn Sun persisted to shine its rays of light on rags of clouds.

A flight of gulls crossed the sky for a moment: the people who were on the street, instinctively, looked up.

They didn't know anything yet but, that day in Tokyo, a great multitude felt a sense of uneasiness in his soul and looked around, more suspicious than usual.

You could tell there was something wrong with that day of May ...

... as if something terrible was floating in the air!

THEY WERE RIGHT TO BE WORRIED !!

IN FACT ...

... in a notorious Shinto shrine ...

..  TWO PRIESTS OF HIGH LEVEL WERE INVOLVED IN A DIFFICULT EXORCISM !!

Faced with a huge, flaming pyre was a casket of black wood: on it were affixed many seals containing incantations (written with ideograms complex and elegant), in the hope of being able to jail for something terrible.

INVAIN!

IN FACT ...

... THEY COULD DISTINCTLY FEEL THE EVIL AURA HOVERING OVER THEM, COMING FROM A BEING WHO WAS TRYING, IN ANY WAY, TO FIND A WAY OUT !!!

Their concentration was highest, the rhythmic movements of their ritual instruments almost perfect: nothing was left to chance.

A boring chant rang hollow in the air.

[SAKURA, moaning] NEGHINI NEGHINI, NASANUCOLO'... NEGHINI NEGHINI, NASANUCOLO'...
[SAKURAMBO, moaning too] NEGHINI NEGHINI, DO-LO' DO-LO'... NEGHINI NEGHINI.......... eeeeet - TCHOOOO !!!
[Sakura, with grave voice] Don't lose concentration, uncle: a distraction can be fatal.
[Sakurambo, with strange voice] Well, who has never happened to sneeze?

[SAKURA, moaning] NEGHINI NEGHINI, NASANUCOLO'... NEGHINI NEGHINI, NASANUCOLO'...
[SAKURAMBO, moaning too] NEGHINI NEGHINI, DO-LO' DO-LO'... NEGHINI NEGHINI.......... WHY DON'T WE HAVE SOME SUSHI FOR DINNER ?
[Sakura, moaning nervously] NEGHINI NEGHINI, NASANUCOLO'... Maybe_you_did_not_unders tand_what_I_said !!
[SAKURAMBO, moaning too] NEGHINI NEGHINI, DO-LO' DO-LO'... NEGHINI NEGHINI, DO-LO' DO-LO'...

[SAKURA, moaning louder] NEGHINI NEGHINI, NASANUCOLO'... NEGHINI NEGHINI, NASANUCOLO'...
[SAKURAMBO, moaning louder too] NEGHINI NEGHINI, DO-LO' DO-LO'... NEGHINI NEGHINI, DO-LO' DO-LO'...NEGHINI NEGHINI..........


GROWL !!!

[SAKURA, SCREAMING OUR OF HER SOUL] THAT'S ENOUGH, WANT TO KEEP YOUR STOMACH BRAKE ?!?
[Sakurambo, with grave silly voice] I havn't done anything.


RUMBLE !!!

[SAKURA, SCREAMING OUR OF HER SOUL] STOP NOW TO DO NONSENSES OR EVERYTHING WILL GO TO HELL !!
[Sakurambo, with grave silly voice] I said I havn't done anything.


KABOOOOOOOOOOM !!!

[Sakura, now worried] Oh my God, what's happening ?!?
[Sakurambo, still with grave, silly voice] I only know 2 people who can create such a ruckus.
[SAKURA, WITH TREMBLING VOICE, LOST IN PANIC] Y.. YOU MEAN THAT... THAT...

[SAKURAMBO, WITH GRAVE VOICE] A DARK OMEN IS APPROACHING !!!

Damn, he was right !!


IN FACT ....



VOLTS !!

ZAAAAAAAAAP !!!

KABOOOOOOOOOM !!


[LAMU', SHOUTING FURIOUSLY ] YOU STUPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID !!!
[ATARU, SCREAMING WITH WRATH] DAMNED ALIEEEEEEEEEEEEEN !!


[Oh nooooooooo !!!]

Really, seems that some things never change!

IN FACT ...

... the alien, flying, throwing devastating lightning against his "darling", who was desperatly trying to runaway.

[LAMU', still flying, SCREAMING WITH WRATH] YOU DAMNEEEEEEEED, is this your gratitude for having watched day and night while you were in mortal danger?!? (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=2233.0)
[ATARU, still running, WITH SILLY VOICE] Lamù, try to understand: all those girls were there in front of the hospital for days and nights just to give me courage, I could not thank them !!
[LAMU', SAME SITAUTION] BUT YOU COULDN'T MAKE THEM AN AUTOGRAPH ON A PIECE OF PAPER INSTEAD OF ON THEIR BRA OR ON THEIR PANTIES ?!?

Ataru was running desperately to escape the deadly wrath of Lamù and didn't realize that was going to stride up the steps leading to a shinto temple....

... BUT WHEN HE REACHED THE TOP ...

... HEARD A FAMILIAR VOICE !!

A great jump ...

... AND ...

[ATARU, OVEREXCITED] SAKURA SAAAAAAAAAAAN !!! How loooooooooong !!! LET ME HUG YOU !!!

POW !! [/size]

[SAKURA, panting loudly, STILL WITH A GREAT HAMMER] MOROBOSHI, YOU DAMNED, GO AWAY: TODAY I'M NOT IN THE MOOD TO PLAY WITH YOU !!

WAS IN THAT MOMENT THAT LAMU' OVERLOOKED THE SCENE ...

... AND ...


VOLTS !!

ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP !!!

KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM !!!



Finally, after a while of time, the dust raised by the explosion cleared.

[Lamù, groaning nervously] Grrrrrrrr, I cannot see where he's hidden !!!


[SAKURAMBO'S CLOSEUP, SCREAMING] YOU'VE MADE A TERRIBLE THING !!
[LAMU', SCREAMING LOST IN PANIC] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!!

POW !! [/size]
POW !! [/size]
POW !! [/size]
POW !! [/size]
POW !! [/size]

Sakura finally managed to grab the handle of the huge hammer that the alien, terrified beyond measure, still clutched in his hands!

[Sakura, so worried] HOLD LAMU', HOLD YOURSEEEEEEEELF !!
[Lamù, LOST IN PANIC, with trembling voice] I... I.. I WANT TO PUKE !!!
[Sakura, now with clear voice] Hey, you know that Uncle likes stage appearances !
[LAMU', NOW FURIOUS] WITH THAT FACE WOULD BE BETTER TO DEVOTE TO DO SOMETHING ELSE !

[SAKURAMBO'S CLOSEUP, SCREAMING] I SAID YOU'VE MADE A TERRIBLE THING !!

POW !! [/size]

[Sakura, panting loudly, STILL WITH A GREAT HAMMER ON HER HANDS] STOP TO APPEAR SUDDENLY IN THAT TERRIBLE WAYYYYYYYY !!!
[Lamù, now with a great smile and clear voice] In any case I'm really happy to see you again ! How are you ? What about your daughters ?!?
[Sakura, with worried voice] They're right, I will be happy to accommodate you any time you want in my house to drink a cup of tea together but... but ...


[SAKURA, LOST IN PANIC] OH NO: THE WOODEN BOX IS OPEN !!

[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] Something wrong ?!?

At least Sakurambo rose up from the ashes.

[Sakurambo, with trembling voice]You don't realize what you've done.
[Lamù, blinking again her large eyes] What happened ?!?

[SAKURA, WITH WORRIED VOICE] WE WERE TRYING TO TRAP A DANGEROUS EVIL SPIRIT INTO THAT BOX BUT YOU HAVE STOPPED THE EXORCISM BRUTALLY: SURELY HE'S NOW DEFINITELY RUN AWAY ! And .....


AHEM !!!!


Sakura hoped for a moment that the sensation that was feeling was due to the evil influence of that spirit.

INVAIN !!


The point was that...

... Ataru HAD <<HUGGED>> HER AGAIN ...

... AND WAS FEELING HER EVERYWHERE !!!

[Ataru, with silly excited voice] Wooooooow, despite the pregnancy your body is still intact!

POW !! [/size]

[SAKURA, SCREAMING WITH WRATH] WHEN YOU WILL STOP TO DO THE STUPID ?!?
[Ataru, laying on the ground WITH A BIG LUMP ON THE HEAD, with trembling voice] Y... YOUR HEART IS AS HARD AS WHAT I JUST TOUCHED !!!

SEEING THAT SCENE, LAMU' GOT FURIOUS ONCE AGAIN...

... and the chase began again.

As the two boys disappeared behind the horizon, uncle and nephew looked in the face.

[Sakura, back worried] What we can expect now ?
[Sakurambo, with grave voice] We can only pray for the salvation of their souls!

...
...

In the late evening the dust settled and a strange peace descended on the house of Lamù and Ataru: they exchanged a few words and, after dinner, as he sank on the chair (zapping nervously with the TV), she went into the bathroom ...

... made sure there were strange things that could spy on her ...

... and, finally, entered (naked, of course) in the bath.

There was a long, pampered by the hot water ...

... WHEN SUDDENLY ...

... FELT A SUDDEN SHIVER DOWN THE SPINE !!!


SHE TURNED SHARPLY....


... but there was none.

When she came out wrapped herself in the robe and began to dry the hair: this required always a lot of time, so almost forgot about that strange thrill.

But when he took off the robe ...

... SAW "SOMETHING STRANGE" ON HER BACK !!!

She turned slowly to the mirror, so scared ...


... AND ...


[LAMU', SCREAMING LOST IN PANIC] EEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!

If there was one thing that can "shake" Ataru was the case in which Lamù was in danger !

As he heard the cry went up the stairs in the blink of an eye, opened the bathroom door loudly...


.... AND ...


[ATARU, SO WORRIED] LAMU', WHAT'S GOING ON ?!?


POW !! [/size]

THE ALIEN (who had since returned in the tank) PULLED A BAR OF SOAP IN THE FACE !

[Lamù, <<SO EMBARASSED>>, with trembling voice] Y.. you damned... w.. what the fool are you doing ?!? DON'T YOU SEE I'M NAKED ?!?[/size][/b]
[Ataru, so groggy] L.. Lamù, w... what the hell are you saying ?!?

POW !! [/size]

AGAIN SHE THREW ANOTHER BAR OF SOAP IN THE FACE !

[LAMU', SO ANGRY] YOU DON'T KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD "RESPECT" ?!?
[Ataru, SO MUCH GROGGY] L... Lamù, y... you're used to walk around rather naked any time !! MORE, NOW I USE TO STRIP YOU RATHER ANY NIGHT !! What the fool...


BONK !! [/size]


WHEN LAMU' PULLED THE ENTIRE BATHROOM CABINET IN THE FACE ATARU FINALLY UNDERSTOOD THAT SHE DIDN'T LIKE HIS PRESENCE IN THE BATHROOM AT THAT TIME !!

That night Lamù spent an interminable time to bathe.

With a brush and using every kind of soap tried desperately to "delete" that "thing" that had appeared on the back ...

... BUT SHE COULDN'T !!!

[Lamù, mumbling to herself] Oh my God... I CANNOT ERASE IT WITH NOTHING !! It's... it's better to hide it for the moment: tomorrow I'll go in deep with the situation.
Also because if anyone would notice ...
... OH NOOOOO, MY REPUTATION IS ALREADY COMPROMISED ENOUGH (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1677.msg36105#msg36105): I CANNOT EVEN IMAGINE WHAT COULD HAPPEN WORST IF THIS THING BECAME PUBLIC !


When she entered into the bedroom wore a long nightgown (according to her, it was absolutely anti-erotic)...

... entered silently into the bed ...

... and took "refuge" in a corner of the bed, well away from Ataru.

BUT ...

[Lamù, lost in panic with trembling voice] D... DARLING, W.. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ?
[Ataru, with silly excited voice] <<COME CLOSER>>, SAID THE SPIDER TO THE FLY !!

Lamù only now realized that had committed a serious mistake ...

... but it was too late to feel remorse or do anything.

IN FACT...

... had forgotten to remove the "SPECIAL SHEET" OUT OF THE BED ... (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1005.0)

... (THE ONE WHO HAS A PARTICULAR APHRODISIAC EFFECT ON THE PEOPLE - EVEN SHAM POO KNEW THIS THING) (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1345.msg30327#msg30327)...

... and Ataru was now so excited to escape all control ...

... AND BEGAN TO PALP HER EVERYWHERE !!

The alien tried to struggle in every way from that kind of animal embrace ...

... but every effort was in vain!

[Lamù, same worried voice] D.. Darling, p.. please: hold, h.. hold !!
[Ataru, same excited silly voice] Uh uh uh, you've to know: I PREFERE YOU WHEN YOU PRETEND TO RESIST !!
[Lamù, TOTALLY RED IN FACE] D.. Darling, p.. plese, n.. not this night... [ehm]... I GOT AN HEADHACE !!

THAT PHRASE WAS THE <<COUP DE GRACE>> !!

Ataru grabbed her nightgown...

... took it out with a quick movement ...

... AND FINALLY SAW HER BACK ...

... AND ...


[ATARU, SCREAMING LOST IN PANIC] YEHOHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH !!!
[LAMU', SCREAMING LOST IN PANIC TOO] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!

Both instinctively retreated a few steps on the bed.

[ATARU, STILL LOST IN PANIC] L... LAMU', W... WHAT IS.. WHAT IS THIS ?!?
[Lamù, SO RED IN FACE, with trembling voice] D.. darling th.. this is not how it seems.... I can... I can explain you all !!

A BLIND RAGE FILLED THE SOUL OF ATARU !!

[Ataru, now rather with wrath] Well, if you think that this one could excite me...
[Lamù, same situation] ... <<yes>> ?!?

..
..

[ATARU, SCREAMING WITH ALL HIS STRENGHTS] .... YOU'RE RIIIIIIIIGHT !!
[LAMU', LOST IN PANIC] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!!


...
...
... [ehm] ...
...
...
... [A-hem] ...
...
...
... [Oh my GooooooooooooD] ........
...
...

HEY, WHAT IT MEANS <<WHAT'S GOING ON>> ?!? MOM DIDN'T EXPLAIN YOU ANYTHING WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD ?!?
ANYWAY, THIS IS NOT AN HENTAI TALE !!
[/COLOR]

In any case...


... (after a long, long time) ....

... Ataru finished the [AHEM !!!!] "GASOLINE" and begun to sleep, snoring loudly although, from time to time, was chewing in his sleep, as if had just eaten something delicious and still felt the taste in the mouth.

ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BED LAMU', NAKED AND EXHAUSTED, WAS DESPERATLY TRYING TO SURVIVE !!!

[Lamù, panting loudly and mumbling to herself] [hanf, hanf] M.. MEN, I LIKED !! [hanf, hanf] The point now.. [hanf, hanf] the point now is.. [hanf, hanf] .. HOW TO HIDE THIS... THIS CURSE ?!?

AND THE WORST WAS YET TO COME !!

IN FACT...

... the day after Lamù arrived, after a long flight, at the studio where he was to do a photo shoot with her sister Sham Poo.

Nobody paid much attention to the fact that, instead of her usual bikini, was wearing a stretch t-shirt and a pair of short (AND HOT) pants, also because, whatever she wears, the result was always "explosive".

Rather, the alien found a pleasant surprise!

[Lamù, with joyful voice] BENTEN CHAN !! WHAT A LOVELY SURPRISE !!
[Benten, giggling so much] Hi hi hi: I was curious to see you "at work", so I asked to your sister if I could see you !
[Lamù, now with serious voice] AND WHAT ABOUT YOUR... YOUR...
[BENTEN, SERIOUS TOO] THE ONLY THINGS I DRINK ARE JUST SPARKLIG WATER AND FRIUT JUICE !! (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1225.0)[/URL]

In that meantime the chinese arrived.

SEEING HER, LAMU' FELT THE BLOOD FROZE IN THE VEINS !!

[Sham poo, so joyful] Hello Sissy, you finally came.
[Lamù, with trembling voice] SH.. SHAM POO, W.. WHY YOU'RE WEARING JUST A ROBE ?!?
[Sham poo, now giggling a bit] Hi hi hi, I am Leady to do this service. YOU, INSTEAD, STAlTS TO UNDlESS!
[Lamù, now with EVIL sight and voice] Are you became a perverted ?
[Sham Poo, blinking her large eyes] Sissy, really you don't notice anything stLange about the set today?

The alien looked around...

... and saw that the scenery around her showed a stunning tropical beach !

[LAMU', SO SCARED, WITH TREMBLING VOICE] Sh.. SHAM POO, w... what we had to do today ?
[SHAM POO, WITH CLEAR VOICE]TODAY WE HAVE TO lEALIZE A PHOTO SERVICES THAT ADVERTISE A NEW TANNING ClEAM, FOl THIS WE WILL POSE IN TOPLESS!

HEARING THAT, LAMU' BECAME TOTALLY RED IN FACE !!

[Benten, with strange voice] Lamù, what's going on ?!?
[LAMU, SO MUCH EMBARASSED] gh... gh... but... but... I SHOULD POSE IN TOPLESS ?!?
[Sham Poo, now with clear voice] Don't woLLy, we weLe okay with the pLoduction that we coveLed ouL ... "stLategic points" with ouL haiL, then no one will see moLe of ... "allowed"!

[LAMU', LOST IN PANIC] NO, NO:  I DON'T WANT !! I DONT' WANT ! ... [ehm] ... [now with fragile sweet voice]I AM ASHAMED !!
[Sham poo, with EVIL sight and voice] Sissy, the penalty to be paid if the seLvice won't be completed on time is veLy high!
[Benten, giggling so much] Hi hi hi, don't worry, I understand: SHE JUST WANT TO MAKE "THE PRECIOUS" !! DON'T WORRY, I KNOW HOW TO MANAGE HER !!

[LAMU', TOTALLY LOST IN PANIC] B.. BENTEN.. W.. WHAT .. WHAT WANNA DO ?!?


A SUDDEN JUMP ...

... and, with a single gesture, Benten took off the shirt of Lamù ...

... AND ...

[BENTEN, SHOCKED] EEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!
[SHAM POO, SHOCKED TOO] EEEEEEEEK !! S... SISSY, W.. WHAT IS THIS ?!?


The alien stepped back, just enough to keep her backs to the wall, so as to avoid that someone else saw what had on the back.

[LAMU', TOTALLY RED IN FACE, with trembling voice] Sh.. Sham Poo, B.. Benten, th.. this is not how it seems.... I can... I can explain you all !!

[SHAM POO, SO MUCH SCARED] S.. Sissy, I know how much you love daLling but... DON'T YOU THINK TO HAVE GONE OVERBOARD ?!?

[Benten, RATTLING SO MUCH, WITH TREMBLING VOICE] Lamù, you.... you...
[Lamù] Benten, pl.. please d... don't...

[BENTEN, SCREAMING] YOU PERVERTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE D !!!

[LAMU', LOST IN PANIC] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!

[to be continued]
Title: Re: BRIGAND GHOST
Post by: Fxt on June 25, 2011, 03:27:23 PM
not bad, not bad ^^
Title: Re: BRIGAND GHOST
Post by: gatulon on June 29, 2011, 11:11:27 AM
If Lum has in her back what I think ::) ...... poor Lum ! 

Quote
[Lamù, TOTALLY RED IN FACE] D.. Darling, p.. plese, n.. not this night... [ehm]... I GOT AN HEADHACE !!

Wow, who would have thought that even Lum uses the most used contraceptive by women, the "headache"?  ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: BRIGAND GHOST
Post by: GiovaneDinamitardo on July 15, 2011, 12:17:10 AM
URUSEI YATSURA, THE UNOFFICIAL 10TH SEASON (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=993.0)[/b][/color] (click on this link to read the whole plot of this saga).

"BRIGAND GHOST"

CHAPTER TWO: COULD YOU GIVE ME THAT RECEIPE ? [/size]


Tomobiki, early May.


Lamù hardly would have forgotten that strange day in May: both Sham Poo and Benten remained seriously impressed by the hell that she had on the back but the alien still hoped to be able to avoid that it could become public knowledge, that's why (instinctively) had retreated her back to the wall.

[Sham Poo, rattling so much] J.. just one thing, Sissy: WHO'S THE MAKEl ?!?
[Benten, still scared too] I.. I know just one man so much perverted in the whole universe that.... THAT...
[LAMU', GETTING ANGRY] BENTEN, DARLING IS INNOCENT !!

[BENTEN, LOST IN PANIC] S.. SO... WHO ELSE KNOWS SO WELL THAT DETAIL ?!?

HEARING THAT PHRASE, LAMU' BECAME TOTALLY RED IN FACE, EMBARASSED AT MAXIMUM...

... but, in that meantime, both Sham Poo and Benten begun to mumble and whisper among themselves.

[Benten, whispering] I.. really don't know what to think...
[Sham Poo, mumbling] Th.. the point is that... that.. I HAVE NO TELMS OF COMPALISON !
[Benten, getting scared] ... also because, if that "thing" had been made live...
[Sham Poo, getting scared] .. OH MY GooooooD ...
[Benten, TOTALLY RED IN FACE] P.... POOR KANEDA, IT'S BETTER THAT HE NEVER KNOWS OF HIS MISFORTUNE !!
[SHAM POO, TOTALLY RED IN FACE] P.. POOl lANMA, I SWEAl I'LL KEEP THE SEClET AS NOT TO HUlT HIS PlIDE !!
[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] Sham Poo, Benten: what the fool are you saying ?

[SHAM POO, SO RED IN FACE, WITH TREMBLING VOICE] S.. SISSY, TH.. THAT IS JUST A DlAWING: IT DOESN'T COllESPOND TO lEALITY, lIGHT ?!?

[LAMU', FURIOUS] AAAAAAAARGH, YOU DAMNED PERVERTED: INSTEAD OF GIVING ME AN IDEA ON HOW TO CLEAR THIS THING YOU CARE ABOUT SUCH NONSENSE ?!?

In that meantime, the alien made a little jump in fly.

FATAL ERROR !!

IN FACT ...


... she hadn't noticed that the wall where was crouched was fake, because it was nothing more than a simple dividers of the set.


It fell down, with an heavy thump ...

... and the blast was so big and strong that completely lifted her long hair ...

... SO HER BACK WAS COMPLETELY DISCOVERY AND VISIBLE ...

... AND ...

[LOTS OF PEOPLE, SCREAMING LOST IN PANIC] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!

AT LEAST EVERYONE SAW WHAT THE ALIEN WAS DESPERATELY TRYING TO HIDE !!

ON HER BACK LAMU' HAD A SORT OF (elegant and colored) TATTOO DEPICTING ATARU ...

... (in a curious and funny silly pose, as if had been "photographed" a moment after being hit by a kind of explosion) ...


.. NAKED !!


STARK NAKED !!


... BUT WITH A POWERFUL..... [AHEM !!!!] ..... <<SETUP>> !!


Many of the people in the room began to photograph it with their mobiles ...

... meanwhile, lots of girls got literally terrified ...

... while others began to whisper among themselves maliciously!

[A girl, whispering] I knew, I knew !!
[A girl, whispering] SHE'S NOT ONLY A SEX-STARVED NYMPHOMANIAC...
[A girl, whispering] SHE'S ALSO A PERVERTED !!
[A girl, whispering] And who else could haldle her...
[A girl, whispering] ... if not that horny lecher of Moroboshi...
[A girl, whispering] ... THAT CLEARLY MUST HAVE A SORT OF "SUPERPOWER" ?!?

On hearing those words Lamù went out of control by the wrath and began to "charge" a lightning of colossal dimensions ...

... ... but, fearing for her safety and for that of all the people present, Benten authoritarian took the word.

[BENTEN, WITH CLEAR VOICE] MY_FRIEND_IS_NOT_A_PERVE RTED !!

On hearing those words, the alien's face brightened, while all others were silent, so afraid.

[Lamù, so touched] Oh, Benten: I knew that I can trust you !!
[A girl, so scared] W.. what do you mean ?!?

The "goddess of fortune" took a few steps forward...

... occupied center stage ...

... narrowed her eyes...

... put an hand behind her head...

... AND ...

[Benten, with curious voice] Well, you need to know that she loves tinkering in the kitchen but [large pause, great breath..] ... BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO COOK.. so...
[Lots of girls, so curious] ... <<SO>>  ?!?
[Benten, same voice] Well, what she brings on the back is nothing but a "side effect" of one of her (terrible) recipe made of ultra-hyper-piquant spices !
[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] Benten, what the hell are you saying ?!?
[Lots of girls, rattling so muc] Y.. YOU MEAN THAT..

[BENTEN, WITH CLEAR VOICE] THAT WHEN MOROBOSHI TASTED HER "CREATION" THE RESULT WAS AN EXPLOSION SO STRONG THAT HAS LITERALLY BURNED HIS CLOTHES AND, UNWITTINGLY, "PRINTED" ON THE BACK OF MY FRIEND HIS IMAGE!

Hearing that, all the girls got shocked ...

.. anyone begun to rattle and tremble so much ...

.. AND, AFTER SOME INTERMINABLE SECONDS...

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOM !!

ANYONE FLOCKED AROUND LAMU' !!!

[Lamù, so scared, trembling so much] W... What do you want from me ?!?

[ALL THE GIRLS, SCREAMING THREATENINGLY] GIVE US THAT RECEIPE !!

...
...


The same "rhyme" was repeated in front of the production managers who, terribly embarrassed, were happy to postpone the date of the photo shoot.

Later, the three girls were walking freely on the streets of Tomobiki: Benten, heedless of all, continued to wear her usual skimpy clothing while both Sham Poo and Lamù were coated with shorts pants and stretch shirts.

... [ehm] ...

Oh, well: NOONE OF THEM WERE CARING ABOUT THE HUGE NUMBER OF HEART-ATTACK WHO WERE "SOWING" AMONG THE MALE POPULATION !!

[Benten, wiht triumphal voice] You have not still thanked me for having taken off the hook!
[LAMU', FURIOUS] AH, SO I SHOULD THANK YOU WHEN NOT ONLY DIDN'T DENY THAT I'M NOT A NYMPHOMANIAC BUT WHICH, AFTER ALL, I DON'T KNOW EVEN COOK?!?
[Sham Poo, giggling so much] This is not the thLuth, Sissy ?!?
[LAMU', SCREAMING OUT OF HER SOUL] I'M NOT A SEX-STARVED NYMPHOOOOO !!!

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOM !!


A HUGE GROUP (perverted) BOYS FLOCKED AROUND LAMU' !!!

[Lamù, so scared, trembling so much] W... What do you want from me ?!?

[A boy, so excited] I.. I HEARD RIGHT ?!?
[A boy, so excited] Y.. YOU SAID <<I AM A SEX-STARVED>> ?!?
[A boy, so excited] Y.. YOU SAID <<I AM A NYMPHO>> ?!?
[A boy, so excited] L.. Lamù, I... I CAN GIVE YOU <<AN HELP>> IF NEED !!
[A boy, SO MUCH excited] I TOO !!
[A boy, SO MUCH excited] I TOO !!
[A boy, SO MUCH excited] I TOO !!


VOLTS !!

ZAAAAAAAAAAAP !!


KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM !!



... [ehm] ...

Usually, something like that was enough to remove the alien from encumbrances.

NOT THIS TIME !!

IN FACT...

... the enormous electrical discharge vanished the clothes that was wearing...

... it meant that now she was wearing just her notorious bikini ...

... SO ANYONE COULD SEE HER BACK AGAIN ...

.. AND ...

[XX, SCREAMING LOST IN PANIC] EEEEEEEEEEEK !!!
[Lamù, so scared] gh..gh... w.. what's going on ?
[BENTEN, so worried] OYUKI CHAN, WHAT'S THE MATTER ?!?

The Queen of Neptune, seriously embarassed, was hiding her mouth with the edge of her kimono...

... AND WAS TREMBLING SO MUCH !!

[Oyuki, still lost in panic, with trembling voice] L.. Lamù... your... your tattoo...
[Lamù, TOTALLY RED IN FACE, with trembling voice] O.. Oyuki th.. this is not how it seems, I can.. I can explain you everything !!
[OYUKI, SAME SITUATION] ... YOUR TATTOO IS TOO DISREPUTABLE TO BE SHOWN IN FRONT OF A QUEEN !!
[Lamù, same situation] O.. Oyuki, y.. you must know that... that..

[SHAM POO, IN A FUNNY POSE, WITH A GREAT SMILE AND CLOSED EYES] THIS IS A "SIDE EFFECT" OF ONE OF THE (TEllIBLE) lECIPE OF SISSY MADE OF ULTlA-HYPEl-PIQUANT SPICES: WHEN DAlLING TASTED HEl "ClEATION" THE lESULT WAS AN EXPLOSION SO STlONG THAT HAS LITElALLY BUlNED HIS CLOTHES AND, UNWITTINGLY, "PlINTED" ON HEl BACK HIS IMAGE!

On hearing these words the neptunian became strangely pensive.

Meanwhile...

[Sham Poo, same situation] You don't need to thak me foL...
[LAMU', talking slowly with wrath] SHAM POO, MY_LITTLE_ANGEL, first of all LEAVE TO CALL ATARU "DARLING", SECOND...

[OYUKI, rather whispering] L.. Lamù, p.. please: come closer.
[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] Eh ? Why ?
[Oyuki, same situation] W... well, I.. I wanted to ask you a thing.
[Lamù, same situation] About ?!?

[OYUKI] COULD YOU GIVE ME THAT RECEIPE ?!?

...
...

Later, after that Benten and Sham Poo had bought another dress for Lamù...

[Benten, with clear voice] Rule number one: AVOID TO THROW LIGHTNING THAT CAN DESTROY YOUR DRESS !!
[Lamù, so angry] OH, AND IN WHICH WAY I'LL DEFEND MYSELF FROM ANOTHER ATTACK OF A GROUP OF MANIACS ?

[BENTEN, WITH CLEAR VOICE] JUST LEAVE'EM TO ME !!!


[gh... gh.. gh....]

Ok, the "goddess of fortune" knew how to be "persuasive"...

... AND CHARGED UP A HUGE MACHINE-GUN !!

[Sham Poo, with clear voice] In any case we leally need to go in deep about this mysteLy: Sissy, what did you do wLong in these last days ?
[Lamù, so embarassed] W.. well, I think that... I STOPPED AN EXORCISM BRUTALLY, SO...
[SHAM POO, GETTING ANGRY] WHAT-THE-FOOL-HAVE-YOU-DONE ?!?
[Benten, getting worried] Oh no, so the tattoo that you've now on your back could be the result of a curse ?
[Lamù, with clear voice] SAKURA !! She certainly knows a way to remove...


SPLASH !!


[Benten, with angry pissed voice] I'm sure he did it on purpose !!
[LAMU', FURIOUS] YOU DAMNEEEEEED !!
[SHAM POO, FURIOUS TOO] MIAAAAOEW - RRRRRRRRRRRR !!

... [ehm] ...

The point was that a huge truck ran over a great puddle...

... AND HAD COMPLETELY SOAKED THE THREE GIRLS !!

[Benten, so disgusted] A bath !! I really need a bath !!
[Lamù, same situation] I too !! AND ALSO A NEW CLOTH !!!
[Sham Poo] MIOEW ! MIOEW ! MIOEW !

AS USUAL, SHAM POO, CONTACT WITH THE COLD WATER, HAD BECOME A PRETTY KITTY !!

The alien grabbed her by the scruff (with wrath) !!

[LAMU', SO ANGRY] YOU'LL BE GOOD UNTIL WE’LL HAVE BOUGHT BACK ANOTHER DRESS FOR YOU TOO, RIGHT?
[Sham Poo] Mioew ?

...
...

Later, they were laying (nakeds) into the (hot) water of a little public bath: while Benten was enjoing the location, Sham Poo was (desperatly) washing the back of her sister.

[Benten, so happy] Wooooow, it's a real piece of luck that this little paradise is still open !!
[Lamù, so worried] Sham Poo, does it work ? You're washing my back since an hour.
[Sham Poo, panting loudly] [pant, pant] N.. nothing to do, Sissy [pant, pant]: any soap is able to eLase youL tattoo !!
[Benten, getting thoughful] Damn, this means that we cannot delete it using a standard solvent and maybe even a laser ray would be able to remove it.
[Lamù, with clear voice] Let's not waste time: dry and dress up quickly and go straight to meet Sakura!

In the same time that the alien got up, four girls entered into the same room.

Anyone had with herself just a little towel, just to hide her ... [a-hem] ... <<main target>>.

[Kasumi, with genlte voice] Oh, Ukyo: you've been very kind to invite us here: this place is really delicious.
[Ukyo, with gentle voice too] I'm glad that you like it !!
[Nabiki, with strange voice] Just one question, little sister: COULD YOU EXPLAIN WHAT KIND OF CRAP YOU AND RANMA WERE DOING IN THE BATHTUB? I don't understand how he managed to break it !
[AKANE, FURIOUS] I TOLD YOU THAT I WAS ALONE AND WASN'T DOING NOTHING STRANGE, BUT ...

WAS IN THAT MOMENT THAT THE ALIEN ROSE FROM THE WATER...

... WITH HER BACK "WELL ON SIGHT" !!

[ALL THE GIRLS, SCREAMING LOST IN PANIC] EEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!

Hearing that scream, Lamù got all red in face...

.. turned slowly ...

... AND ...

[Lamù, blinkin her large eyes] Hey, I know you: we spent together last Christmas. (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1135.msg27670#msg27670)

[AKANE, TREMBLING SO MUCH] BUT.. BUT... I STILL DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU WERE A SO GREAT PERVERTED !!
[LAMU', SCREAMING WITH WRATH] I'M NOT A PERVERTEEEEED !!
[Sham Poo, with trembling voice too] Akane, Ukyo, Nabiki, Kasumi, th.. this is not how it sees: we can.. we can explain you all.
[Kasumi, so scared] I.. I really hope so !!
[Nabiki, scared too] SH.. SHAM POO, TH.. THAT IS JUST A DRAWING: IT DOESN'T CORRESPOND TO REALITY, RIGHT ?!?
[Akane, same situation] Even because... even because...
[UKYO, CRYING SO MUCH] SHAM POO, PLEASE, SWEAR TO ME THAT YOU'LL NEVER TALK ABOUT TO RANMA, IT'S BETTER THAT HE NEVER KNOWS OF HIS MISFORTUNE !!
[KASUMI, SCARED TOO] OH MY GoooooD, SO EVEN TOFU-SAN...


AHEM !!!

The other two sisters turned immediately to Kasumi...

... and began to look at her in a strange, worried way !!

[Nabiki, now with curious voice] Kasumi, w.. what the fool are you saying ?
[AKANE, GETTING WORRRIED] YOU MEAN THAT YOU.. YOU ARE NOT... YOU ARE NO MORE..
[KASUMI, SWEETLY RED IN FACE, WITH GENTLE VOICE] W.. WELL.. D... REALLY YOU WERE THINKING THAT THE LOVE I FEEL FOR TOFU-SAN WAS JUST <<PLATO>> ?!?
[LAMU', STILL FURIOIUS] THAT'S ENOUGH !!! LET ME EXPLAIN !! THIS IS JUST...

[Benten, suddenly rose up from the water, with clear voice] ... THIS IS JUST A "SIDE EFFECT" OF ONE OF THE (TERRIBLE) RECIPE OF MY FRIEND MADE OF ULTlA-HYPEl-PIQUANT SPICES: WHEN ATARU TASTED HER "CREATION" THE RESULT WAS AN EXPLOSION SO STRONG THAT HAS LITERALLY BURNED HIS CLOTHES AND, UNWITTINGLY, "PRINTED" ON HER BACK HIS IMAGE!

Hearing that, all the girls become so much thoughful.

[Lamù, still angry] Grrrr, we're really wasting time here !! [now screaming] BENTEN, TAKE WITH YOU MY SISTER: ME AND YOUR STARBIKE WILL FLY UNTIL SAKURA'S HOUSE !! IN THAT WAY NOBODY CAN SEE ME !!

The alien had just taken off ...

... but was gently grasped by an ankle by Ukyo and Kasumi.

[Lamù, with curious voice] .. ehm ... what's the matter ?

[Ukyo, with low voice] L.. Lamù, please, we wanted to ask to you a thing.
[Kasumi, rather whispering] Don't worry, we'll keep the secret.
[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] About ?!?

[UKYO & KASUMI] COULD YOU GIVE US THAT RECEIPE ?!?

...
...

The idea of the alien was right: despite the long flight noone longer disturbed them, so they were able to reach the (new) Sakura's house, where she was living with  and their little twins.

For the case the priestess was hanging laundry in a corner of the garden.

[Sakura, with gentle voice] Wow, how many nice people came to visit me today.
[Benten, with clear voice] SAKURA SAN, HOW LONG !!
[Sakura, now whispering] Ssssssssssssh, don't scream in that way otherwise my babies could wake up.
[Sham Poo, so joyful, whispering too] Oh my God, Sakura, could you show them us ?!?

After a few moments, three pairs of feet went lightly up the stairs (of course the alien was flying) but, finally, all of them could see the twins !!

[Benten, whispering] Oh my GooooooD: how they're sweets, how they're niiiiice !!
[Sham Poo, whispering too] Wow, I don't know if they look moLe like you oL Tsubame !!
[Sakura, whispering too] Well, all I can say is that our chromosomes have been mixed to perfection !!
[Benten, same voice] You can say that again! By the way, your body was not affected at all of pregnancy.
[Sakura, same voice] Benten, are you flattering me ?
[Sham Poo, now so worried] Sissy, what's going on ?!?

THE ALIEN WAS CRYING SILENTLY !!

[Sakura, so worried] Lamù, what's the matter ?

[Lamù, still crying] N.. [sigh] Not even two months [sigh] have passed [sigh] from that Aiko [sigh]is come back [sigh] with his parents (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1677.0)[/size][/b][sniff]... Darling... [sigh] Darling liked her so much [sigh] ... and I [sigh]... I [sigh] ... HAVE LOST MY BABY ! (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1131.0I)[sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh][/size][/b]

The chinese hugged sweetly her sister.

[Sham Poo, with gentle voice] D.. don't woLLy Sissy: you.. you'Le still young !!
[Lamù, still crying] WAHAAAAAH !! MY LITTLE ANGEL FLOWN AWAY !! [sigh sigh sigh sigh]
[Benten, now with worried voice] .. ehm... Sakura, the real reason we're here is another ?
[Sakura, blinking her eyes] N.. Nan-da ?!?

Later, into the lounge (and in front of four cup of tea) ...

[Sakura, so worried] So ? What's the matter ?
[Lamù, SO RED IN FACE] W.. well, d.. do you remember what happened just yesterday ?
[Sakura, now rather angry] SURE !!
[Benten, with worried voice] W.. well, all except this one we could expect !!
[SHAM POO, TOTALLY RED IN FACE] T.. take a look to the back of my sisteL but.. BE STlONG SAKUlA, PLEASE: BE STlONG !!

THEY LIFT UP THE SHIRT OF LAMU' WITH A SINGLE MOVE...

... AND ...

[SAKURA, LOST IN PANIC] GH... GH.... GH.... L... LAMU', W... WHAT IS THAT.... THAT <<TATTOO>> ?!?

[SHAM POO, IN A FUNNY POSE, WITH A GREAT SMILE AND CLOSED EYES] THIS IS A "SIDE EFFECT" OF ONE OF THE (TEllIBLE) lECIPE OF SISSY MADE OF ULTlA-HYPEl-PIQUANT SPICES: WHEN DAlLING TASTED HEl "ClEATION" THE lESULT WAS AN EXPLOSION SO STlONG THAT HAS LITElALLY BUlNED HIS CLOTHES AND, UNWITTINGLY, "PlINTED" ON HEl BACK HIS IMAGE!

[LAMU', SO ANGRY] YOU STUPID, SHE'S THE ONE THAT NEED TO KNOW THE TRUTH !! STOP TO SAY NONSENSE LIKE THIS !!
[Sham Poo, scratching her head, with embarassed voice] W.. well...
[Benten, blinking her large eyes] Sakura, what's going on ?!?

TOTALLY LOST IN PANIC, SAKURA DID FEW STEPS AWAY FROM LAMU' !!

[SAKURA, TREMBLING SO MUCH] L.. LAMU', TH.. THAT IS JUST A DRAWING: IT DOESN'T CORRESPOND TO REALITY, RIGHT ?!?
[Lamù, so much embarassed] gh... gh.. let me explain.

The "rhyme" wasn't long at all and as soon as the alien finished, Sakura took one of her sticks filled with hanging and handed it in front of her: like they were attracted by an invisible magnet, they began to float in the air, attracted by Lamù's body!

[Sakura, with grave voice] Damn, you're right: you're full of negative energy !
[LAMU', LOST IN PANIC] Y... YOU MEAN THAT... THAT...

[SAKURA, SAME VOICE] THAT SPIRIT THAT ME AND MY UNLCE WERE TRYING TO IMPRISION HAS TAKEN REFUGE IN YOUR BODY AND DON'T WANNA LEAVE YOU FOR NO REASON!

[Sham Poo, with trembling voice] B.. BUT... WHY THAT.. THAT <<SIDE EFFECT>> ?!?
[Sakura, scratching her head, still with grave voice] Well, you've to know a terrible truth.
[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] About ?

[SAKURA, BACK WITH GRAVE VOICE] The evil spirit who trying to imprison BELONGED TO A JAPANESE PAINTER OF XVI CENTURY, MORE FAMOUS TO HAVE TRIED TO ... "OWN" HIS MODELS RATHER THAN FOR HIS WORKS!

[LAMU', BACK LOST IN PANIC] S.. SO... TH.. THE TATTOO THAT I'VE IN MY BACK...
[SAKURA, SAME VOICE] It reflects his state of mind and summarizes what he would do to you!!
[Lamù, same situation] Y.. you mean that... that...

[SAKURA, SAME VOICE] THAT IF WE WON'T ABLE TO CHASE IT FROM YOUR BODY HE COULD, GRADUALLY, ASSIMILATE SO MUCH ENERGY TO "BUILD" BACK A MATERIAL BODY AND THEN WILL BE ALSO ABLE TO .... "JUMP UP" TO YOU, JUST TO TO SATISFY HIS PERVERSION!

[Lamù, now with evil voice] Oh, so just leave him to me: I'll throw so much lightnig on him that nobody will identify him once again, nor from his teeth.
[Sakura, with grave voice] Lamù, even if you'll be able to destroy his body the ghost that is inside of you will re-begin to "build" it again and again.
[Benten, with grave voice too] Damn, it's worst than a virus of a pc: it means until you give "hospitality" to him inside your body will reappears any time !!
[Sakura, still with grave voice] WORST, YOUR TATTOO WON'T DISAPPEAR AT ALL !!   

Lamù wanted to scream out loud, lost in panic, so great was the terror that had seized her ...

... but, providentially, both Benten than Sham Poo covered her mouth!

[Benten, whispering nervously] Sssssssssssh, do you really wanna wake up the childrens ?
[Sham Poo, with worried voice] Sakura, is possible that theLe is no solution that can help Sissy ?
[Sakura, with clear voice] WE MUST MEET MY UNCLE, WE REALLY NEED HIS EXPERIENCE !!
[Lamù, now with clear voice] Don't waste more time, let's fly to...
[Sakura, now with curious voice] ... ehm ... just one second Lamù, I wanted to ask to you a thing.
[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] About ?
[Sakura, now so red in face] Well, about what the fool said by your sister...
[Lamù, same situation]... <<yes>> ?!?

[SAKURA, TOTALLY RED IN FACE, WITH LOW VOICE] ... COULD YOU GIVE ME THAT RECEIPE ?!?



[to be continued]
Title: Re: BRIGAND GHOST
Post by: GiovaneDinamitardo on August 18, 2011, 01:01:40 PM
URUSEI YATSURA, THE UNOFFICIAL 10TH SEASON (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=993.0)[/b][/color] (click on this link to read the whole plot of this saga).

"BRIGAND GHOST"

CHAPTER THREE: THE GREATEST EXCITATION [/size]


Tomobiki, early May.


That afternoon, the impatience of Lum had exceeded all bounds: She wanted at all costs to get rid of that embarrassing tattoo she wore on the back but was becoming more difficult than expected.

Among other things, at that time there was also another obstacle to overcome into Sakura's Hose.

[Lamù, getting nervous] So, what the hell are we waiting for ? Let's go immediately to..
[Sakura, rather whispering] Sssssssh: have you forgotten that my babies are still sleeping ? I cannot leave them alone !!
[Benten, getting nervous too] Damn, now what we can do ?
[Sakura, same voice] Don't worry, Tsubame will come back soon.

She was right: after few minuts someone knocked gently on the door.

This one was opened gently...

... and appeared the figure of Tsubame, that he was carrying four shopping bags (two per hand) ...


... AND ...


....
...
..

GRAB !!!

.... [ehm] ...

... W.. WHAT THAT BREATHTAKING EMBRACE !!

[Tsubame, SO MUCH SURPRISED, with trembling voice] gh... gh... S.. Sakura w.. what's going on ?!? W.. what should I this warmly welcome

?!?
[SAKURA, RATHER CRYING] OH dear.. [sigh] ... how much [sigh].. how much I love you... [sigh].. I wasn't... [sniff]... I WASN'T AWARE ABOUT YOUR BAD LUCK but.. [sigh] ... but ... [sigh].. ONLY NOW I REALIZED HOW DIFFICULT IT WAS FOR YOU TO MAKE ME GET PREGNANT OF OUR BABIES [sigh sigh sigh sigh]!!
[Tsubame, SO MUCH DISTRAUGHT] S... SAKURA W.. WHAT THE FOOL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ?!?

[Lamù, still nervous] Grrr, I can't bear anymore !! [NOW SCREAMING] BENTEN, TAKE WITH YOU MY SISTER AND SAKURA: NOW THAT REINFORCEMENTS HAVE ARRIVED WE CAN DEVOTE OURSELVES FULLY TO SOLVE MY PROBLEM !!
[Benten, so scared, with trembling voice] L.. Lamù, d.. don't
[Sham Poo, same situation and voice] D.. don't scLeam like this !!

Too late.

A (desperate) crying coming from upstairs was a clear signal that the babies were now awake ...

... but, in that meantime, all the girls got out from the house ...

... AND SOMEONE WERE LEFT IN DIFFICULTIES !!

[TSUBAME, SO SCARED, WITH TREMBLING VOICE]S... SAKURA TH... THIS IS DISERTION !!!

Outdoor, meanwhile, the alien was rather to take off.

[Lamù, still screaming] BENTEN, TURN ON YOUR ENGINE: WE MUST FIND....


... BONK !!!

SOMEONE HIT THE ALIEN IN FLY !!

[XX, WITH WRATH] YOU DAMNED, WATCH YOUR STEEEEP !!!
[Lamù, WITH A GREAT LUMP ON THE HEAD, so confused] gh.. gh.. I.. I don't understand: WHO OTHER THAN ME CAN FLY ON THIS PLANET ?!?

The alien opened her eyes...

.. AND ...

[YOUKO, still flying, so scared]THE DEVIL !!
[Lamù, still flying, so scared too] THE DOG ! (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1082.msg26752#msg26752)
[/url]

[YOUKO, NOW FURIOUS] I'M NOT A DOG: I'M A FOX !!
[LAMU', FURIOUS TOO] AND I'M NOT AN EVIL, I'M AN ONI !!
[/size][/b]
[Youko, now with curious voice] By the way, what's the hell that you've on your back ?!?
[SHAM POO, IN A FUNNY POSE, WITH A GREAT SMILE AND CLOSED EYES] THIS IS A "SIDE EFFECT" OF ONE OF THE (TEllIBLE) lECIPE OF SISSY MADE OF ULTlA-HYPEl-PIQUANT SPICES: WHEN DAlLING TASTED HEl "ClEATION" THE lESULT WAS AN EXPLOSION SO STlONG THAT HAS LITElALLY BUlNED HIS
CLOTHES AND, UNWITTINGLY, "PlINTED" ON HEl BACK HIS IMAGE!
[Lamù, back furious] I can give you the receipe if you like, now let us go.

The "fox" giggled a bit...

.. AND ...

[YOUKO, AMONG A LOTS O GIGGLE] OH, I DON'T NEED IT: YOU WELL KNOW THAT KEITA HAS A BETTER <<ARMAMENT>>  (http://www.lum-chan.com/index.php?topic=1145.msg27844#msg27844)!! [and disappeared in the sky, still giggling]

[BENTEN, SO SHOCKED] N.. NAN-DAAAA ?!? TH.. THERE IS EVEN WHORSE ?!?
[Sakura, so embarassed] W.. well, it.. it depends what you mean when you say "there is even worse" !!
[Sham Poo, SO MUCH MALICIOUS] SISSY, IN WHICH WAY YOU KNEW THAT HER BOYFlIEND HAS A BETTEl <<AlMAMENT>> THAN THE ONE OF DAlLING ?!?
[Lamù, TOTALLY RED IN FACE, with trembling voice] It's... it's a long story... but.. [back furious] THAT'S ENOUGH !! I NEED SOMETHING ABLE TO HIDE THIS DAMNED TATTOO !!

At least the chinese had the right idea.

[Sham Poo, with clear voice] Well, we could do like that movie that spoke about that funny "pink submarine".
[Benten, giggling so much] Oh, are you talking about "Operation Petticoat" ? It was really funny: Kaneda and me really couldn't stop laughing.
[Sakura, with clear voice] You're right: the crew did paint panties and bra to return to decency that embarrassing tattoo that had on his chest !! WE COULD DO THE SAME THING TO YOU (even if it's just a temporary remedy).
[Benten, so embarassed] B.. but.. w.. who never accept t.. to paint a pair of pants on... on...
[Lamù, with clear voice] SHINOBU !! When we went to school had the highest grades in art education !

After a long fly the space-bike of Benten and the alien landed in front of a Insurrance Agency; they entered without hesitation.

Shinobu was sitting in front of a desk and had just finished talking on the phone: was wearing an elegant suit, softened from her graceful beauty (which was not changed since time of school).

[Shinobu, with clear voice and a great smile] Oh, welcome back you all: seems to be back in the old days ! What good wind brings you?
[Sakura, with worried voice] WIND STORM, SHINOBU: we really need you !!
[Shinobu, blinking her eyes] S.. Sorry ?!?
[Lamù, SO EMBARASSED] Sh.. Shinobu, y.. you had the highest grades in art education, right ? [Shinobu, blinking again her eyes] S.. sure b... but.. this thing got ?!?
[BENTEN, SO RED IN FACE] W.. WELL, WE NEED YOUR HELP TO DRAW A PAIR OF PANTS OVER HERE !!
[SHINOBU, LOST IN PANIC]S.. SORRY ?!? <<A PAIR OF PANTS>> ?!?

Sham Poo authoritatively took the situation in hand: grabbed her her sister by the arm...

... made her do a half turn on herelf...

... and jumped up his (long) hairs ...

... AND ...

[SHAM POO, WITH CLEAR VOICE] WE JUST NEED SOMETHING OF TEMPOlAlY THAT CAN HIDE THIS <<DETAIL>> !!
[SHINOBU, TOTALLY RED IN FACE]L.. Lamù, r.. really y... you needed to reveal <<THAT>> detail of Ataru?


.... [ehm] ....

The expression of the alien became suddenly serious and terrible.

[Lamù, getting nervous] Shinobu, how come that YOU'RE THE ONE who is not afraid to deal with this detail?

She hided gently her face with her hands...

.. closed a bit her eyes...

... AND ..

[Shinobu, SWEETLY RED IN FACE, rather whispering] W.. well... ONCE WE WERE LOVERS, YOU KNOW !!

BOOOOM !!

[Benten, rattling so much] Y.. you mean that.. that you.. YOU AND THAT DAMNED MANIAC OF MOROBOSHI...
[SHAM POO, WITH SILLY VOICE] WOOOOOOOW: WHElE DID YOU FIND A QUIET COlNEl IN TOKYO TO MAKE LOVE IN PEACE?!?
[LAMU', <<SIMPLY FURIOUS>>] YOU DAMNED !! SO YOU STILL DATE HIM HIDDEN ?
[SHINOBU, NOW FURIOUS TOO] YOU STUPID, WHAT THE FOOL ARE YOU SAYING ?!?

Blinded by rage, the two girls got ready to rumble: Lamù began to load a huge thunder and Shinobu raised above the head her desk.

Sakura authoritatively took the situation in hand

[Sakura, with serious voice] No, no, no: not this way. Shinobu, let me explain the situation; Lamù, calm yourself.

After a long "rhyme" both of the girls calmed down and, in a short time, Shinobu created a true "work of art"!

[Shinobu, with clear voice] VOILA' !! More beautiful even than those that can be seen in the Sistine Chapel in Rome!
[Sakura, with clear voice too]Obviously this is only a temporary solution.
[Lamù, with clear voice too] It still means that we cannot waste more time !! Sakura, lead us immediately to your uncle.


After a short fly the four girls landed in front of the tent of the (deranged) priest: he was sitting, with closed eyes and joined hands, really seemed was praying.

[Sakurambo, with grave voice] I feel a bad omen is approaching.
[Sakura, so angry] Don't say nonsense at usual, uncle: we just need to know how to remove this curse !
[Sakurambo, same voice] Curse ? Y.. you mean that..
[Sakura, still worried] That's right: the spirit we were trying to imprison took refuge inside the body of Lamù and doesn't want to

leave it for no reasons.
[Sakurambo, getting pensive] Mmmmmh... this is really a bad omen.
[Lamù, getting nervous] Grrrr, stop to say nonsense and give me an idea to remove it from me !!

[SAKURAMBO'S CLOSE UP, SCREAMING] THERE IS A WAY !!
[LAMU'] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!


POW !!
POW !!
POW !!
POW !!
POW !!


[Sham Poo, so worried] Sissy, how aLe you ?!?
[LAMU', SO DISTRAUGHT] I... I WANNA PUUUUKE !!
[Sakura, HOLDING BENTEN] NOW STOP: WE NEED MY UNCLE ALIVE !!
[BENTEN, STILL WITH A GREAT HAMMER ON HER HANDS] SO TELL HIM TO STOP MAKING A SUCH TERRIBLE APPEARANCE LIKE THAT!

After a little time, when I finally Sakurambo was unearthed from the pit which forced by dint of hammering of Benten ...

[Sakurambo, WITH A LOTS OF LUMPS ON HIS HEAD and trembling voice] as I was trying to say, THERE IS A WAY !
[Sakura] Don't waste time, say it immediately.

[Sakurambo, with grave voice]That spirit is sensitive to both the feminine beauty and excitement: if we could create a "spiritualist field" (generated by any kind of excitement) very powerful he would be attracted as a magnet; in that way, while he's leaving the body of Lamù, a single gesture would be enough to seal it again to the eternity !

[Sakura] Of course but where we could find something or someone able to generate a such great excitation ?
[Benten, giggling so much] Don't worry Sakura, WE JUST NEED THE HELP OF THE GREATEST LECHER OF THE UNIVERSE !!
[LAMU', GETTING FURIOUS] I FORBID YOU TO TALK ABOUT DARLING IN THAT WAY !!
[Benten, now with clear voice] Lamù, tries to reason: it will be enough to excite Ataru in the "right way" to generate that damned

spiritualist field so strong that will surely able to attract the spirit. WE JUST NEED A BAIT TO SUMMON HIM !!
[Sakura, with clear voice] You're right, we just need a bait.
[Sham Poo, with closed eyes and a great smile] SuLe, WE JUST NEED A BAIT.


After a while

...
... [ehm] ...
...

[BENTEN, WITH TREMBLING VOICE] W... WAIT FOR A WHILE, WHY I MUST BE THE BAIT ?!?

[Sham Poo, still with closed eyes and a great smile] Because you'Le so wondeLful, so sexy...
[Sakura, with strange voice] ... AND BECAUSE THIS IS THE DUMBEST IDEA I'VE EVER HEARD.
[Sham Poo, now with clear voice] Don't caLe about heL: now now lean against that tree and do what I said.


The "goddes of fortune" leaned back, stiff as a board, to the tree...

... bent a knee...

... than an arm...

... AND ...


[BENTEN, TOTALLY RED IN FACE] OH... OH-MY-GOD-I-BROKE-THE-LACET-OF-MY-BRA !!


... [ehm] ...


[Lamù, in fly, with curious pose, sight and voice]Should something happen?
[Sakura, with crossed arms and nervous voice] What a silly idea !!
[Sham Poo, getting nervous] No, no, no: Benten, you'Le at all Sexy. [NOW SCREAMING] OUT OF THE WAY, LET ME TlAY !!

Just few step...

.. AND...


OOOOOOOOOOOOH !!!


.............. [wow !!!]

Ok, the Chinese really knew how to behave.

She gently leaned against a tree...

... bent the right knees enough to gently pull up ("DANGEROUSLY") her short skirt...

... softly put a hand on her chest..

... AND, WITH AN INCREDIBLE SEXY VOICE ...

[SHAM POO, SO MUCH SEXY] OH MY GoooooD, I BlOKE....


WHOOOOOOOOOOOM !!!

[ATARU, SUDDENLY APPEARED, WITH HOT VOICE] OH, SWEET LITTLE CHINESE OF MINE: SOMETHING IS TROUBLING YOU ?!?


[BENTEN, SO SHOCKED] IF... IF THIS IS NOT A RECORD IS NOT FAR OFF !!
[SAKURA, SHOCKED TOO] IF... IF I HADN'T SEEN WITH MY EYES I WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT!
[LAMU', FURIOUS] DARLIIIIIIING, ARE YOU TRYING TO FLIRT ONCE AGAIN WITH MY SISTEEEEEEEERRR ?!?


VOLTS !!

ZAAAAAAAAAAAP !!!


[Ataru, screaming lost in pain] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH !! But I hadn't even touched her with a finger !!
[SHAM POO, NOW FURIOUS] SISSY, YOU DON'T COOPElATE AT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL !!!
[LAMU', STILL FURIOUS] NO WAYYYY !! GET ANOTHER IDEA THAT DOESN’T ALLOW DARLING TO BETRAY ME !

The chinese got pensive for a while...

... AND ...

[Sham Poo, <<seriuos>>] All Light, let's tLy in this way [now with clear voice] SAKUlA, BENTEN, COME MOlE CLOSE TO ME !!
[Benten, so confused] Sorry ? Why ?
[Sakura, so confused too] W.. what we should do ?
[Sham Poo, WITH EVIL SIGHT AND VOICE] JUST CLOSE YOUl EYES !!

They did it...

... AND, SUDDENLY, THE CHINESE GRABBED THEM BRUTALLY ...

... AND ...


... BONK !!!!

[Benten, moaing in pain] Y.. YOU DAMNED... Y.. YOU ALMOST DESTROYED MY TEETH !!
[Sakura, moaning in pain too] Y.. YOU STUPID.. Y.. YOU ALOST DESTROYED MY LIPS !!
[Lamù, back in fly, with curious sight and voice] Sham Poo, what the hell you wanted to do ?

[Sham Poo, SWEETLY RED IN FACE, with gentle voice] WELL, I THOUGHT THAT FOl A MAN WAS EXCITING TO SEE TWO WOMEN KISSING EACH OTHEl!

[BENTEN, <<SIMPLY FURIOUS>>] YOU STUPIIIIIID !!
[SAKURA, SO MUCH FURIOUS] YOU FOOL !! IF YOU WANNA DO SOME KIND OF CRAP DO IT BY YOURSELF !!
[LAMU', FURIOUS TOO] YOU'RE RIGHT !! MOST OF ALL, STUFF IN YOUR MIND THAT I HAVE NO INTENTION OF BECOMING A PORN STAR TO...


WHOOOOOOOOM !!


A LOTS OF (PERVERTED) GUYS SURROUNDED THE ALIEN !!

[Lamù, so scared, with trembling voice] W.. what do you wanna from me ?!?

[A guy, so excited] I knew, I knew !!
[A guy, so excited] Sooner or later it would have happened !!
[A guy, so excited] L.. LAMU', R.. REALLY YOU WANNA BECOME A PORN STAR ?!?
[A guy, so excited] W.. well, in that case.... LET ME BE YOUR PARTNER !!
[A guy, SO MUCH excited] I TOO !!
[A guy, SO MUCH excited] I TOO !!
[A guy, SO MUCH excited] I TOO !!
[A guy, SO MUCH excited] I TOO !!


VOLTS !!

ZAAAAAAAAAAAP !!!



[LAMU', SCREAMING FURIOUSLY] GO AWAYYYYY !! YOU MAKE ME SUUUUUUUUUCK !!!!!!

[Benten, screaming] THIS IS THE RIGHT TIME, SAKURA: BEGIN THE EXORCISM !!
[Sakura, so nerouvs] No, no, no, not this way: also Lamù must to be excited: in this way, the spirit will be so confused that will be

forced to come out of her body to search for the source of the spiritualist camp. As you can see, your friend is not excited at all !!
[Sham Poo, with EVIL voice] Don't woLLy, I got a betteL idea.

In that meantime the alien had just finished to throw lightnig: had launched so many and so intense that destroyed her clothes and now wore only her famous bikini.

Her sister approached her gently...

.. AND ...

[SHAM POO, "SO KIND"] SISSY, COME WITH US: YOU NEED NEW CLOTHES AND TO lELAX TOO !!

All of them took the opportunity to do some shopping so no one noticed of the fact that the Chinese insisted so much to gift to her

sister a shirt and a pair of jeans (worn once!).


... AND, AFTER SOME TIME, INTO AN OVERCROWED STADIUM...

[Commentator, so excited] Ladies and Gentlemen, THIS-IS-BASEBALL!
Hanshin Tigers had started the game in the worst way possible and at the end of the third inning were losing 0-5. I don't know what might have told the coach to his players but something of magic must have happened: since then, they began a relentless comeback and now, that we are the last inning, the result is 5-6, but now Hanshin Tigers have Uraki in second base and, above all, Taiki, their best hitter, has just taken the field.
The stadium has become a real bedlam, all people is screaming for a home run: if it happen, Hanshin Tigers would be able to win the game at the last minute!

Meanwhile, inside the TV control room...

[Director, so excited]There is still a few seconds before the shot, see if you notice any interesting person among the people to pin down.
[Assistent director, SO MUCH EXCITED] OH MY GOD, LOOK: THE PRINCESS OF THE ONI IS AMONG THE PEOPLE !!
[Director, SO MUCH EXCITED] WOOOW, WHAT THAT PIECE OF LUCK !! Tell a cameraman to frame her forever, maybe we could manage to make a great bang!


Elsewhere, meanwhile...

[LAMU', SO MUCH EXCITED] YIPPEEEEE !! YAHOOOO !! HURRA FOR HANSHIN TIGEEEERS !!
[Benten, so worried] Sakura, now the conditions are perfects: give in with that damned exorcism !!
[Sakura, so nervous] I've been trying since we entered but that spirit is pretty damn stubborn !!
[BENTEN, SO MUCH WORRIED] OH NO, THE MATCH IS RATHER TO END !!
[Sham Poo, "serious"] Don't woLLy Benten, we've still a chance.
[Benten, blinking her eyes] Really ?
[Sham Poo, rather whispering] Come moLe close to me, I'll tell you my idea...

Meanwhile...

[Commentator, "so nervous"] The pitcher is ready ... he's trying to hypnotize his opponent ... is to load the shot ... not yet ... not yet ... wait a little, but ...



[COMMENTATOR, EXCITED AT TOP] HE DID IT !! TAIKI HIT THE BALL WITH GREAT POWER !! YES, IT'S A HOME RUN, IT'S HOME RUUUUUUN !!

The ball designed a whimsical dish in the sky...

... AND ...

[LAMU', SO MUCH EXCITED] IT'S MINE !!
[SHAM POO, SCREAMING] GET lEADY BENTEN, WE WON'T HAVE ANOTHEl CHANCE !!
[BENTEN, SO MUCH EMBARASSED, with trembling voice] B.. but... IT'S TOO SHAMEFUL THE FOOL THAT YOU'RE ASKING ME!
[SHAM POO, STILL SCREAMING] THElE'S NO CHOICE !!


ALL HAPPENED IN A MOMENT !!

[LAMU'] I GOT IT !!!

[SHAM POO, SCREAMING] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOW !!
[Benten, TOTALLY RED IN FACE] OH MY GoooooooD !!

[ASSISTENT DIRECTOR, SO MUCH EXCITED] WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW !! LOOK AT THAAAAAAAAAAAT !!!
[DIRECTOR, OVEREXCITED] SEND THIS SHOT IN WORLDVISION !! IT WILL REMAINS INTO THE HISTORY OF TELEVISION !!

[ALL THE PEOPLE, OVEREXCITED] OOOOOOOOOOOOOH !!!

...
...
...
...
... [ehm] ...
...
...
...

[SAKURA, SCREAMING] YATTAAAA !! I HAVE SEALED HIM AGAIN, THIS TIME FOR ETERNITY !

...
...
...
...
...
...
... [A-hem] ...


...
...
...
...
...
...
...


AN UNBEARABLE ROAR ROSE FROM THE STADIUM !!

[Lamù, blinking her large eyes] W.. what happ...  EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK !!!!




Ok, Sham Poo had the right idea: confused by the huge excitement, for a moment the spirit left the body of the alien but that second was

fatal and Sakura managed to imprison him again...


... BUT THE PRICE TO BE PAID WAS SO HUGE !


IN FACT...

... THE INSTANT WHEN LAMU' CAUGHT THE BALL, SHAM POO AND BENTEN TORE OFF HER SHIRT ...

... AND THE ENTIRE PLANET COULD ADMIRE ONCE AGAIN HER IN TOPLESS !!!

..
..
..
..

Some days after, the streets of Tomobiki were still buzzing.

IN FACT...

[ATARU, getting excited] CIAO BABY, WHAT ABOUT A DATE WITH ME ?
[A girl, getting excited too] Oh my GooooooD, are you really THAT Ataru Moroboshi ?!?

Elsewhere, meanwhile...

... Sham Poo and Benten were walking down the street...

... BUT BOTH OF THEM WERE WEARING THE SAME MASK OF THE CATCHER !!

[Benten, with trebling voice] Sh.. Sham Poo, th.. the situation is totally out of control !!
[Sham Poo, rattling so much] Y.. you know that.. that I.. I had no choice !!

BONK !!

A BASEBALL BALL HIT BENTEN ON HER MASK !!

[BENTEN, FURIOUS] YOU STUPID, WATCH OUT !!
[a guy, so embarassed] F.. forgive me.. I was.. I WAS JUST TRAINING !!

.. [ehm] ..

The point was that THE ENTIRE MALE POPULATION OF TOKYO WAS TRAINING (on the street) TO PLAY BASEBALL...

... AND ANYONE WAS THINKING THE SAME !!


[A guy, mumbling to himself and getting excited] IF LAMU' LOVE SO MUCH BASEBALL...
[A guy, mumbling to himself and getting OVEREXCITED] I'VE DECIDED: THE GOAL OF MY LIFE IS TO BECOME THE GREATEST BASEBALL PLAYER OF ALL TIME!

In that meantime...

... LOTS OF EXPLOSIONS RIPPED THE AIR OF THE CITY ...

... but noone called nor the police nor the firemen ...

... RATHER, YOU CAN HEAR LOTS OF WOMEN GIGGLING SO MUCH !!

[SHAM POO, GETTING SCARED, with trembling voice] B.. Benten, c... COULD YOU GIVE ME A lIDE TO UlU PLANET ? I lEALLY MISS MOM AND DAD SO MUCH !
[BENTEN, LOST IN PANIC] S.. SURE ! L.. LET'S TAKE OFF IMMEDIATELY !!


THAT EVENIG, THE SAME SCENE WAS "ON AIR" IN MANY HOMES IN THE CITY !!

IN FACT...

[Tsubame, blinking his eyes] SAKURA, WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU PREPEARED FOR DINNER THIS EVENING ?
[SAKURA, <<so innocent>>] Well... all I can tell you is just that... IS A VERY EXOTC RECEIPE !!

Elsewhere, meanwhile...

[Tofu-san, getting confused] I.. I really don't understand: I FEEL THE SCENT OF WASABI, HOT PEPPERS, HORSERADISH AND TABASCO !
[KASUMI, <<so innocent>>] Well... Ok, IT'S <<A BIT>> PIQUANT BUT...

Elsewhere, meanwhile...

[RAMNA, SCREAMING OUT IN PAIN] AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH !! IT BUUUUUUUUUUUURNS !!!
[UKYO-CHAN, <<so innocent>>] Oh, Ranma, not this way !! All right IT'S <<A BIT>> PIQUANT BUT...

Elsewhere, meanwhile...

... A SAMURAI WAS POINTING HIS SWORD IN FRONT OF A QUEEN !!

[SHUTARO, LOST IN PANIC] N... NO WAY !! I SAID I WON'T EAT ANOTHER BITE !!
[OYUKI, <<so innocent>>] Oh, Titty, don't act like that !! All right IT'S <<A BIT>> PIQUANT BUT... EAT IT, WILL DO YOU GOOD FOR YOUR <<HEALTH>> !!

[Tsubame,Tofu-san,Ranma,Shutaro and a lots of other boys in Tokyo] b.. but.. why I should eat that.. THAT EXPLOSIVE ?!?

[Sakura,Kasumi,Ukyo-chan,Oyuki and lots of other girls in Tokyo] JUST EAT IT !!
Title: Re: BRIGAND GHOST
Post by: gatulon on September 10, 2011, 11:57:23 PM
Damn, why you don't know how to draw?

This one is a story that I'd like to see turned into a manga!